Magina - Cowboy AU
by sasyst
Summary: Dota fanfiction: Just as the title says, a Cowboy AU (with fantasy elements) with Magina, the Anti-Mage. He owns a ranch. One day he meets Kael in town. Predictable ;)
1. Chapter 1

A little unsure about the ranch stuff. I hope I didn't write it totally wrong.

If so, I apologize. I just wanted to write some love story with cowboy hats and boots.

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Magina tried to open his eyes. He thought it got more difficult to get up from week to week. He felt more tired every day and he wasn't sure how long he could keep this up.

 _Stop_. He admonished himself. Negative thoughts wasted too much energy he could as well put into something useful. Like getting out of bed to start with the chores.

He dragged himself into the kitchen, trying to pull his pants and a well-worn shirt on while walking. He almost stumbled, grimaced and stopped to button the pants. Next was the coffee. It would take a few minutes until it was ready. There wasn't much Magina was able to do while still half asleep but sitting around and waiting was no option.

As soon as he stepped out of the door and onto the porch of his house, his five dogs raced towards him, circling around his legs until he almost stumbled again. He petted every one shortly, which was enough for the beasts to give him some room to breathe. And to keep walking.

The first check of the day were the chickens. Not only because it was easy to feed them (possible even half asleep), but because Magina needed their eggs to get a breakfast ready.

The house already smelled of coffee and Magina took a deep breath, followed by a satisfied sigh. He downed the first cup while he scrambled the eggs, then he took a second with him outside. It was still mostly dark, but there was so much to do alone on a ranch that he couldn't wait until the sun was up.

A bark had him looking up, but it was only some rabbit on the field. It was gone faster than one of the dogs was able to chase it.

Every day had the same pattern for Magina. His animals needed feeding and care, they had to be checked. Then, with the first rays of sunlight hitting the earth at his feet, he saddled a horse and rode out to look after his cattle. He had put his hat on and had grabbed whatever he might need on the way. He checked the fences and tried to get a feeling for the weather the coming days. He fetched some water for his garden so he didn't have to use drinking water for that.

It was very important to have a garden for several reasons: first, because Magina didn't have time to go shopping in the next village, since it was more than an hour by car away. And second, because he didn't have the money to buy food. And, well, third, because he didn't want to meet anyone, didn't want to have to talk to others.

Since the day his whole family had died, he had distanced himself more and more from the world outside the ranch. He hadn't wanted to see everyone looking at him with pity in their eyes, or worse, calculation. He was fine on his own and he didn't need anyone. At least most of the time.

Three of the dogs accompanied him today, one always staying close while the others raced over the countryside. They met again at the river crossing the ranch land, where Magina frowned at the sinking water level. It was about time they got some rain here. It was still okay as it was but the river was lower than usual at this time of the year. He'd have to see if the side arm still had water and maybe relocate his cattle. That was always the worst. Relocating cattle. Alone, with only five dogs. Of course the dogs were the best trained beasts he knew and they were a huge help, but still.

Magina had to jump from one place to the other without pause. Not like a normal jump. It was something he could do, bridge a space of land with something like a jump. One second he was here and the next he was there. He didn't have to see where he was going and could even jump through obstacles, though he could only span so much space with one jump. It was like a special skill he had been born with and it made some things easier. In the past he had wondered if it was magic, but it didn't feel like magic. Just, like a special skill.

When he relocated the cattle, he used this skill because he had to keep an eye on all sides of the herd at all times. It was exhausting. And he could do the jumping, or blinking as he called it, not endlessly and not together with a horse. So he was on foot during the whole time while permanently changing his position. On these days he got to bed earlier and hated himself for it because that meant he had left some chores open that day.

Lucky him, there was still enough water in the creek. At least for another few days. He had to take it into consideration, though, that he would have to relocate the cattle in about a week, at the latest, if it didn't rain.

During the next hour, Magina observed the cattle. He checked on some of them directly but all in all they seemed to be doing fine. With a relieved sigh he turned away from them and continued along the fence. This was the most work, right after the cattle: keeping the fence intact. There was just so much and it was just so very important. But here everything was fine, too. This was almost too good to believe, a day without a cattle incident or a fence repairing.

It meant he'd have some extra time for his garden and the other animals. And his truck. He had to try if it still started and drove. At the coming weekend was a market combined with some festivities in town and he had to sell some of his cattle. He needed stuff from the market as well and since he only very seldom went into town, his truck would be full when he drove back home. He hated these trips, hated all the people. Especially when there was some festival going on, but he knew that this was the best time to sell and buy. He'd just keep his head low and try not to draw any attention.

The incident with his family had been a long time ago and the looks he got were less and less frequent. One day it would all be forgotten. At least by the others. It wasn't as if Magina could forget about it any time.

He hoped he wouldn't bump into one of the Sunstriders in town. It got more difficult from year to year to let them live, to ignore them, to walk past them as if nothing was amiss. They were the ones that could control the weather to some extent, could create soulless creatures made of fire and could even make fire rain from the sky. They were the ones responsible for all that had happened so many years ago. They had never been found guilty, but Magina hadn't wanted to talk about the events, then. It had all been too much and he had been too young. The few things he had told had been waved off as imaginations from a child. But he knew better. He had been there. He knew what he had seen.

 _Stop_. Magina forced himself to take a deep breath and to push these thoughts aside. They were useless, just made him angry and he didn't have time for anger. He didn't have energy for anger! He had to concentrate on his work, when he made mistakes it would take him longer and he couldn't afford that.

With some vegetables from the garden he went inside the house and pulled a pan out of a cupboard. He chopped the vegetables, took some meat and fried it all together. Some potatoes, too. It was the same almost every day, except that he used different things from the garden. But it was fast to cook and it had the ingredients his body needed. When there was enough time he made bread, but usually there was not time. There were more important things to do than cooking.

He ate outside so he could pet his dogs in the meantime. There was one chair on the porch and a very small table, just large enough to hold one plate and a glass with water.

Next was the truck. Better to do that while the sun was up so he could see what he was doing should repairs be needed. It started running smoothly but when Magina took a look under the hood he saw that it had too little oil. And when he tried to drive a round he found that the gas pedal wasn't working properly. It seemed to be the only problem and he was able to fix it relatively fast. He kept the truck running for a while to see if something else came up but when he drove another round an hour later everything was working as it should.

Since today had been relatively quiet, the roof of the barn needed a check-up. During the last rain, water had dribbled inside on two or three places and it had to be fixed. Two bottles of water drained and with the sun slowly setting, Magina climbed down from the roof. He put the tools away before penning chickens for the night. He fed them, including the dogs and the horses, then got himself supper. He watered the garden (no use doing that during the day) and found he had to get more water from the river. He debated about saddling the horse or not, but then he just used his skill to jump, or rather blink, forward to get to the river and back fast. He had to make two trips and though it had gotten colder by now, sweat ran down his face and arms and his shirt clung to his body. Sticky.

A shower would be nice but that would consume too much water. So Magina just went back to the river a third time. He took his clothes off and waded into the cold. He washed himself, then his clothes and only but his hat and boots back on as he went back to the house. Next to the porch was a washing line from where he took a shirt and pants after he had hung the wet clothes in his hands. It was always the same because Magina only owned three pairs of clothes and one pair was for special occasions. Considering the state of the shirt he had just pulled from the line, he'd have to buy at least one new at the weekend in town.

Inside he wrote that on the list lying on a table. As best as he could, that was. He had received some lessons in writing and reading and math, but it had been a long time ago and he had always been less interested in this stuff than in learning all the other things that one needed to manage a ranch. So his writing skills weren't the best. His math had gotten better, out of necessity he supposed.

After a last round through the barn and stables (naked except boots and hat, because there was no one around anyway), Magina went to bed. It had been an astonishingly calm day but the following ones were filled with activity.

Magina was glad he had repaired the truck and the roof of the barn because he wouldn't have had time to do so before the weekend. He decided to relocate the cattle sooner rather than later because it didn't look like it would rain during the coming days. And he didn't want to run the creek dry. It was as exhausting as always and Magina dragged his arse back home when it was already dark. He hadn't watered the garden and the chickens were still outside. He was sweaty and so dirty everything he was wearing had the same dust-brown colour. As had his skin.

Horses, chickens, dogs, garden, a quick dip into the river, clothes and then he desperately needed something to eat before he fell into bed.

The next day wasn't much better, because some of the cattle had decided they didn't like the new place and had wandered off. Great.

By Saturday, Magina felt like he had been on his feet nonstop for a year. He was bone-deep tired. And he had to get into town today. He could as well go on Sunday, but there would be even more people milling around and he wanted to avoid that. At least everything was back to normal today and on his round over the ranch nothing seemed to be amiss.

Magina packed what he needed for a day in town. The two cows he wanted to take with him for selling came into the trailer and some of the chickens on the truck bed. He'd try to sell more and have the seller come and pick up the cattle. He didn't have anything to get more than two cows into town and he really didn't want to wrangle them there.

Two of the dogs would accompany him. He felt better with them as company.

A last check in the small mirror in his bedroom. Magina had put his best clothes on, which meant he had pants without holes and a shirt that wasn't transparent from constant use. He had cleaned his boots and had pulled his two colts out of the drawer. Normally he didn't need them and therefore didn't wear them, but it was different in town. He didn't want to use them there but it was a show. A show of strength or something. He also took two knives with him, more weapons than tools.

He pulled his hat a little lower on his forehead, trying to conceal the purple marks, or tattoos, on his skin. They were too eye-catching. Satisfied with his appearance, he got into the truck. At his whistle, the dogs raced towards him. Two jumped in and he petted the other three. "Good pets."

As he closed the door, the dogs stayed back and watched him drive away. If it didn't get too late, at least one would be sitting at the same spot when he got back. They took turns, waiting for him. He smiled a little at that.

The town was utter chaos. Too many cars, too many people and too many animals. Magina almost cursed as he manoeuvred through the streets. He already hated this day.

In the end, it wasn't that bad. He had his cattle sold within an hour and had several promises for the following days of people wanting to come over and buy some more. The chickens were even less of a problem. It seemed the good care Magina gave his animals was showing.

Only one hour! Which meant he had lots of time to get all the stuff on his list. He moved through the crowd, his eyes on the ground, hat pulled deep into his face. Only very few people looked at him and only a handful seemed to know who he was. To say Magina was relieved was an understatement. But it had been many years and the strange incident on the farm this far away from town probably had been forgotten by now. At least by most people and definitely by the younger ones. Why should they care about something that had happened when they had been kids?

Another plus was that Magina saw not a single Sunstrider. The town was big enough and with that many people around it wasn't that likely to run into one of them.

It took Magina some time to find everything he needed, especially since he had to walk several times because he couldn't carry that much and had to load it on the truck before going back. One of his dogs stayed with the truck, the other followed him. He loved them, they were so very loyal and they were his only friends.

With everything finished, and only half of the day over, Magina decided to take a walk over the place. He didn't really have time but just once in a while he needed to breathe, to take a few minutes off while not thinking about the ranch and the work he had to do. He felt comfortable today because no one paid any attention to him. He was just some guy on a market. It was nice.

There was a lot to see. Other ranchers sold their cattle and Magina inspected some of them because he was curious about the animals. Were they healthier than his? Bigger? Fatter? He was absolutely satisfied with his after he had taken a look at some of the cows. He was doing fine.

Magina didn't talk. Only when he sold, because he had to, but now there was no reason. When someone asked him a question he shook his head or pointed or whatever. It wasn't even that uncommon to be short with words so he didn't get more than one odd look about this behaviour.

Where the market ended, the festival began. Magina stopped, debating whether he should continue or not. Since he had some money left he decided to buy a nice meal. He thought he had earned it. While eating, he continued, careful not to bump into anyone, until he saw a bronc rodeo taking place. He leaned against a pole a little away but still near enough for him to be able to see everything. Rodeo was something Magina had never been good at but watching it was fun. Some of the persons were really spectacular and some were lying on the ground after only a few seconds. It was difficult, he knew that, and he had respect for everyone who tried their luck here. Especially in front of so many people, all cheering and laughing.

When a horse jumped, not very horse-like, more similar to a goat or something, it looked so funny, Magina laughed softly. It had been a good idea to stay a while longer. This was nice, the food was delicious and he could almost feel how minute after minute not only his body relaxed more and more, but his mind as well. He was still tired but he wasn't as tense as before. He enjoyed himself.

The next participator walked into the ring. The man was tall, maybe taller than all the others and his posture was so full of confidence, Magina thought he could almost _feel_ it where he was standing. This was going to be interesting. He pushed away from the pole and walked closer, shifting through people until he was at the fence of the rodeo circuit. Everything about the man was different than any cowboy Magina had ever seen. The first thing was his long blond hair. He had it partly pulled back into a ponytail high on his head, but only the hair that could blow in his face during the rodeo. The remaining fell over his back down to below his shoulder blades. He was clad almost completely in white, accentuated with gold. His pants had a purple stripe on each side down his leg and it had fringes all in gold. His boots were rimmed with gold, as was his vest. He wore a purple long-sleeved shirt underneath that was skin-tight and covered half of his hands, only leaving the fingers free. He had no hat on, which would've been impossible with the ponytail anyway. He looked out of this world, too proper, too polished. But confident.

He ignored everyone as he walked to the wooden enclosure with his horse. Before he mounted, he looked at the crowd once. It was the first time Magina saw his face and he was stunned. The man was beautiful. Breath-taking, heart-stopping beautiful. The man's gaze swept over all the people and for a split second, their eyes met. Magina thought the man held his gaze a moment longer, thought it lingered when it hadn't done so with anyone else. But as he turned away, Magina wasn't sure.

The rodeo was unbelievable. The horse was white, too, perfectly groomed so its fur shone in the sunlight. Mount and rider looked spectacular as they burst out of the enclosure, all white, hair and mane flying alike. Eight seconds weren't that much, at least not for the ones watching. When on a bucking horse, they seemed like eternity. The man's face held a frown of concentration but his posture was good. The horse jumped and flipped but the rider sat firm.

Magina stared in silent amazement as the crowd around him cheered.

Before the man left the circuit, his eyes flickered to Magina for a second. Coincidence, maybe.

The next participants were by far not as good as the man in white and so Magina made room at the fence for someone else. He had stayed far too long and he had to get back to the ranch.

This night, he dreamed about the beautiful man from the rodeo. It had been a long time since he had dreamed about anything pleasant and though he had a hard-on when he woke up, he had a smile on his face. He had never considered himself to be gay but he found it not very disturbing. It didn't matter anyway, alone on a ranch. Who should care what he dreamed about? Definitely not the cattle or the dogs.

Maybe it wasn't as astonishing as it should've been, since Magina had never thought about having a girlfriend or a wife or children. Sure, he had never thought about having a boyfriend, either, but then it was something rarely pondered out here.


	2. Chapter 2

It was about half a year later, when Magina went into town again. He didn't take anything with him to sell, the money from the last sales still lasted. He'd made good money with the buyers coming to his ranch after the festival half a year ago. Of course most of it had gone back into the cattle, but there was enough left for some stuff to repair the barn and for maybe an additional set of clothes. A new pair of boots. Something to add to his daily meals. Maybe some new animals? He wasn't sure yet but he'd take a look at what was offered on the market and decide then.

Magina was in high spirits all morning. He was looking forward to going into town. He didn't lie to himself, he knew that he hoped to see the man again, the man from the rodeo. His dreams had become more and more fuzzy, remembering the face of the man more difficult. He had dreamed often of him and wanted to refresh his memory. He felt almost giddy at the prospect of watching him ride. Magina had gotten used to the dreams. He didn't dread going to sleep anymore, because the nightmares that had plagued him forever were almost gone. Replaced by bright pictures of a blond man on a white horse.

The day was cloudy but no rain was in sight. And with the morning chores done, Magina hopped into the truck. He would've liked to wear something different today, but with what he possessed that wasn't possible. Besides, he didn't really believe that anyone, least of all the rodeo man, would notice that he wore the same shirt.

He had never been vain but today he felt strangely inadequate. He pushed these thoughts away. They didn't matter, he just wanted to catch a glimpse of the most beautiful man he had ever seen, it wasn't as if he thought the man would notice him in return.

His heart ached only a little at that but it was true. Aside from the fact that he simply didn't have time for any kind of dalliance, he didn't think someone as stunning as this man would check out someone as unstunning as him. It was alright, Magina told himself. It didn't matter, he just wanted to enjoy the day. A smile curved his lips, because when had he last done something purely out of the desire to enjoy it? He couldn't really remember. It must've been before the incident. When he still had been free to do stuff for fun and not out of necessity.

First was the shopping, of course. As always, Magina kept his head low, but today he looked left and right, low-key searching for the man in white. He didn't find him but he was probably around the rodeo circuit or something.

There were as many people milling around as the last time, but Magina didn't care today. His mind was elsewhere. He was on edge and therefore finished with shopping way too fast. Though there was already a lot of hustle and bustle where the rodeo would take place, it hadn't yet begun.

Magina strolled around, buying something to drink but nothing to eat. He wasn't hungry, his stomach felt strangely fluttery. He remembered that he had heard about it, or maybe read about it? It had something to do with anticipation. And since he was anticipating seeing the beautiful rodeo rider it was surely justified.

He lounged around, watching people from under the rim of his hat. He leaned against a fence farther away from the circuit, his arms crossed in front of his chest. His dog lay down at his feet and they waited. It didn't take much longer for the first rider to arrive and a cheer went up in the crowd. More and more riders as well as spectators got to the place but Magina stayed where he was. He wasn't interested in the rodeo very much, he basically wanted to see one specific person.

The event began, holding his attention nonetheless. It was fascinating to watch how the horses bucked and the riders held onto their backs. Magina had respect for them and their performances. He almost missed the entrance of the beautiful man, not only because he had been watching the others, but also because he wasn't in white today.

He had his hair open and a hat on. The hat was dark, not really black but with a hint of purple. His pants were wide, traditional rodeo pants, with fringes, just as before. They were dark purple like the hat and the fringes were, like the last time, golden. The pants underneath were white as were the boots, creating bright highlights within all the dark. He wore a simple long-sleeved shirt, same colour with golden highlights, and a white bandanna around the neck. It was a stark contrast to his appearance the last time but it was just as stunning. The purple made the man appeared fairer than he was and his eyes almost shone underneath the brim of his hat.

Magina pushed away from the fence to walk closer to the circle without conscious thought. He was pulled towards the man with invisible strings, his attraction to him strong. The man scanned the crowed and this time when he saw him, Magina was sure that his gaze lingered on him. How could he see him, Magina wondered. Among all these people, why did his eyes stay on him?

As the rodeo began, Magina watched in awe. The man had tiny furrows between his brows as he concentrated on his horse. He moved with the beast as if it was nothing, as if it was easy. Only the tiny frown made one guess how difficult it really was. Suddenly, the man looked up, directly at Magina. The frown eased away and a tiny smile ghosted over the man's lips. It was maybe a second of eye contact but Magina thought time stood still. He was sure he stared like he was stupid but he couldn't help himself. He was fascinated, transfixed. He forgot everything around him, all the people didn't matter as the man looked at him.

Then the horse threw him.

Magina cringed, and was back in reality with a start. The masses around him cried out, then, when the man was on his feet, cheered. The horse pranced around the circle, stopped and snorted, shaking its head.

What a crazy sport to do. Magina pulled his hat lower over his eyes, hiding his smile. The man had been as magnificent as he had remembered, maybe even more so.

Before the next person started their rodeo, Magina had already vacated his place by the fence. He had seen what he had come for, so he could as well leave. He got himself something to eat now. The flutter in his stomach had eased a bit and he was hungry all of a sudden. It tasted delicious but maybe that was merely because he always ate the same (or nearly the same) at home.

He was lost in his thoughts, happy with the day and all and so he didn't hear when someone shouted for him to wait. Not that he would've felt like the call was directed at him if he had payed attention to his surroundings. No one called him, and why should they? He had no friends or anything, never talked to anyone.

Only when his dog growled, then stopped and spun around, did Magina realize that someone was behind him. Close and aiming for him. With a frown, because he just wanted to get home and definitely didn't want to get held up on his way, he turned.

And was met by the bluest, clearest and palest eyes he had ever seen. His breath caught in his throat and the words he had been about to say got stuck. He stared, mouth open and eyes wide because the man was even more beautiful this close. He had perfect features and skin unusually pale for a cowboy. Tiny lines between his brows spoke of him frowning often while the lines around his mouth were from laughing. In spite of these lines he had a strange appearance of agelessness and Magina couldn't have guessed how old he was.

The man lifted his hat as greeting and smiled a tiny bit. "You are awfully fast. Almost escaped me again."

"What?" Magina couldn't make sense of the words. But to be honest, he was very occupied with staring.

"The last time you were here, until I left the rodeo you were already gone. I had to hurry today and I thought you had vanished again."

The words didn't make any more sense and his confusion must've been evident on his features. The smile on the man's face disappeared. "Sorry, I should start at the beginning." He held his hand out. "I'm Kael. Nice to meet you."

Magina looked at the hand, then back up. The man, Kael, was only slightly taller than him. Slowly Magina took his hand. He wasn't sure what was happening and where this would lead, but it was absolutely impolite not to answer. He tried to speak, cleared his throat, then realized he had been holding the man's hand way too long by now. Embarrassed, he let go of the hand all of a sudden and lowered his eyes to the ground. He had to clear his throat a second time before he could, still a bit raspy, get out his name. "I'm Magina."

He didn't know what to say or do next, so he just waited. Kael had initiated this, he was surely the more confident of the two of them. After a moment of silence, Magina looked up from underneath the brim of his hat and caught a glimpse of the man frowning while looking down at his hands. He seemed to think about what to say next but when he realized Magina was looking at him, the lines between his brows eased away and a smile reappeared. "Can I buy you a drink?"

This almost made Magina ask 'what' again, but he stopped himself. It would sound way too stupid with him only getting this one word out and otherwise not talking. He might be unsure about this whole situation but he definitely didn't want to get across as mentally retarded. Or deaf.

It was a pick-up line, if he had ever heard one and Magina wondered why the man would do this. Was he gay? Did he want to find out if Magina was gay? But if so, why? Well, he did wear all this purple and gold and stuff but he didn't actually appear to be gay. Maybe he knew who Magina was and was curious or something? The thought made him even more uneasy.

He wasn't good with people, maybe due to the fact he was never around any. How was he supposed to know what they thought or felt? How was he supposed to know how to react? What to say?

The longer it took for Magina to answer, the more the smile left Kael's face and the frown reappeared. He should really say something, but what?

Just as the man opened his mouth to say more, probably because it took Magina way too long to answer, he blurted out: "Yes." He hadn't wanted to say that but he didn't want to see the man frowning. He was even more beautiful when he was smiling, taking Magina's breath away with it. And though he needed to be able to breathe he found it astonishingly pleasant to be out of breath and all dizzy because of it, from just looking at someone. From getting a dazzling smile.

Kael led him to some benches and got them both a beer. Magina didn't want to drink beer, he never drank any alcohol and he did have to drive home. He figured one beer couldn't hurt, though. And the man was paying for it. He just had to keep a straight face as the bitter fluid ran down his throat. And people enjoyed drinking this? Why?

"So, where are you from?" They sat next to each other and Kael pushed his hat a little back as he looked at Magina. "I've only seen you one other time around here."

Not wanting to tell the man, because if he didn't know where he was from he didn't know all the stories. Magina wanted to leave it at that. He could totally do without the strange or calculating or pitying looks. "I work on a ranch a good distance away. I only drive into town two or three times a year because it's too far." Not completely true. It wasn't that far, it was just that he didn't have time for it. And he not only worked on a ranch, he owned a ranch.

"Oh. That has to be lonely."

It was. But Magina didn't care. Since he didn't like having people around he was comfortable as it was. "It's fine. And I'm not alone." He had his dogs, chickens, horses and cattle.

"Do you, um," the man hesitated. He leaned forward and stared at the beer in his hands. "Do you want to hang out a bit and maybe later go to a restaurant or something and eat together?" He didn't look at Magina, instead turned the beer around and around in his hands.

"I don't have time, sorry." He'd have to leave soon. He had been in town long enough and there was still a lot to do when he got back to the ranch.

Kael nodded. "It's okay, you don't have to give me some excuse to get away. You can just say that you're not into men."

Why would he think this was some excuse? Did people do something like that, give excuses to get away from someone instead of telling the truth? Communicating with humans was so complicated. "It's no excuse. I have a lot of work to do on the ranch. I really don't have time."

The look Kael gave him was searching, as if he didn't believe it and tried to see into Magina to find out if it was the truth. "So you are into men?" The man's voice was low, as if he didn't want others to hear it. Magina knew that being gay among cowboys could cause problems. It had just never concerned him before. He hadn't even really thought about Kael being gay or not. It had all been a fantasy, dreams, it hadn't mattered. He hadn't even really thought about it when he had been invited for a beer, had been too occupied with staring and being amazed by Kael being this close and all. Had been too uneasy about the man talking with him to think about anything.

Of course, the way he had been asked to get a drink together and now to spend the day and go into a restaurant, it was obvious what this would lead up to. What this was about. But it wasn't as if he had experience with things like that. Suddenly Magina was very nervous. The most beautiful man he had ever seen was hitting on him! He had invited him onto something very closely resembling a date. And he had just declined. Because he didn't have time for stuff like that!

For the first time Magina resented his duties. Resented the way he lived alone on a ranch, that he had to do everything by himself, that he had no one he could rely on. No one who could help him out once in a while.

"I'm not sure. I've never thought about it before I saw you. But you are so beautiful and I dream of you almost every night."

Kael stared at Magina with wide eyes and mouth slightly open. "What?"

Had he said something wrong? Magina frowned. Maybe the man just hadn't understood. "I said I'm not sure…"

"I heard what you said." Kael interrupted. He smiled, looked at the beer and then at Magina. "But… why?"

"Why did I say what I did? Because it is the answer. You asked me a question and there was no simple yes or no."

"You are strange." The smile was still there but together with the words, it irritated Magina. He didn't want to be strange. Everyone who knew his story thought him strange, and now this man, without knowing about his past, thought so, too. Kael must've picked up on his irritation. "It's not bad. I meant more, like, intriguing. Refreshing. Different from the others, who are all the same." This eased him. It seemed to be okay. "When do you have to leave?"

The sudden change in topic wasn't easy with the way Magina's thoughts were in turmoil about this whole encounter. "About half an hour ago."

Kael nodded, stood up, took Magina's beer and put it away together with his. "Where's your car? I'll accompany you on your way there."

Magina couldn't help himself, he had to look at Kael all the time. He almost ran into someone two times and stumbled over his dog once. Pathetic. But the man was just magnificent.

The fact that he had approached Magina was unbelievable. That he had invited him for dinner. Him! Next to this perfect human being he was just some lousy cowboy.

At the car, Magina opened the door so his dog could get inside. Then he leaned against the hood, unsure how to say goodbye to Kael.

"Wait a moment." Before he could answer, Kael had slipped away but was back within a few minutes. He approached Magina, stopped only when they were mere inches apart. He removed his hat and put it on the hood of the car before doing the same with Magina's.

The purple marks on Magina's skin must've been at least partly visible even with the hat on but now they were completely uncovered. It made him nervous because they were what made him unique, what made others recognize him. But the man only looked at them shortly, before catching Magina's eyes.

He was very near and very beautiful and Magina's heart pounded heavily in his chest. He couldn't move, was mesmerized by the man and his closeness. It was clear to what this would lead as Kael's eyes locked on Magina's lips. He drew nearer still and Magina closed his eyes.

This would be his first kiss. His heart beat too fast, his stomach tingled, his hands were sweaty and shook slightly and his breathing was way too heavy because it was difficult to get air into his lungs.

But nothing happened. Had he misjudged the situation, the man's intent? Magina opened his eyes. Kael was very close, almost too close to get his face into focus. But he had stopped, and his gaze was searching. For what? Why didn't he close this remaining distance between them? There could be no other intent than a kiss but for some reason Kael hesitated. Well, there was no reason to, Magina decided.

So close to being kissed, by the best looking man he had ever seen, Magina wasn't about to let this opportunity slip away. Theoretically he knew what to do and though he was nervous he wasn't afraid. Besides, his body shouted at him to get this going, to touch, to kiss, to feel. And so he buried one hand in Kael's blond hair, only taking a split second to marvel about how unbelievably soft it felt. With the other he grabbed his belt. He didn't pull, only used his hold on Kael to keep him in place as he leaned up the tiny distance that separated them.

Their lips touched. Kael was tense, his body as well as his lips, but at this touch, he softened. That was when Magina pulled him closer until their bodies met.

Everything around them faded away. This was incredible! The nervousness was gone in an instant and what remained was desire. No shaking hands anymore. His heartbeat was still this fast but, well, Magina supposed the reason had changed. Breathing was still difficult, but the reason for that had changed, too.

Kael sighed and then Magina felt his hands on his body. One wrapped around the wrist of the hand buried in the blond strands and one on his lower back.

Then Kael's tongue flicked against Magina's lower lip before the man sucked lightly on it. Magina gasped, the sensation foreign but good. And it resonated within his growing erection, making it twitch. For a second he wondered if it was okay to be aroused like that from a kiss, especially because Kael had to feel it, the way their bodies touched from head to toes. But then Magina realized that he could feel Kael getting hard as well. Had to be all right, then.

The tongue was there again, and since he liked how it felt, he mimicked the move, licking against Kael's lip. Suddenly the man's tongue met his and that was the moment all remaining thoughts were blown away. Magina had never felt like that, had never been consumed by something the way he was now. Every stroke of Kael's tongue made him burn hotter, made him harder, made him pull the man closer while simultaneously pushing against him. He couldn't breathe, tried to get air into his lungs with tiny gasps. He thought he might explode.

When he moved his hips, rubbing against Kael, the man moaned softly, then broke away from the kiss all of a sudden. "Stop." He was just as out of breath as Magina, the word pressed out while panting for air. "Stop. Not… you…" He took a deep breath and visibly collected his thoughts. "Not here."

Oh shit. Of course not! What had he been thinking! He pushed Kael away. Not forcefully or something, but surely. In the parking lot! In the middle of the town! His cheeks grew red and he snatched his hat to hide the blush underneath it. He had just wanted to kiss Kael but this had gotten out of control. "I, um… I have to go."

"Wait!"

Magina was already half inside the car.

"Here." Kael held a small piece of paper out and Magina took it. "Call me!" With that the man turned around, took his hat and left. Magina watched him adjust the hat and then disappear in the crowd. He looked at the piece of paper. A number was written on it, neat, with the name 'Kael' underneath.

Just great. Magina looked back up but of course the man was gone. If he wanted to tell him that he didn't own a phone, he'd have to chase him down. A glance at the sun high above his head said he didn't have time for that. With a sigh, he leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes for a second.

This had been too good to be true. He'd not only seen the beautiful man he had dreamed about for half a year but the man had also talked to him, invited him to a beer and then they had kissed. Well, maybe more than just kissed, it had probably been a solid case of 'making out'. Not that he knew the detailed differences between these two things, but he had heard about it. Before. Or from conversations he overheard when he was in town.

With a smile on his face Magina drove home. He would've liked to tell Kael that he couldn't call but in the end it didn't make any difference. He didn't want any kind of relationship. He didn't have time for stuff like that and it would only make his life more complicated.


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next weeks Magina found out that he had a problem with mice. He addressed this when the vet came over one day for the cattle. The vet shook her head to Magina' question about poison or stuff. Not good for the environment. Too dangerous for other animals.

Traps weren't an option, either, because there were too many. He could place traps all over but he'd have to check on them constantly and there had to be many. A work that would take too much time. AT least for him. The rabbits were bad enough already.

But the vet had another option for Magina. He could get himself a cat. Or maybe two cats, considering that one alone wouldn't be able to get rid of all these critters. It was a good idea, Magina thought. Cats were beautiful animals and relatively easy to care for when they were barn cats. So he agreed and a week later the vet brought two with her. She also gave Magina some things he might need and told him all about cat care he had to know. While the vet checked the horses, Magina took the cats into the house. They should be allowed to move in and out of every building so they could find every hiding place of the mice. He hoped it would work but if not he could still think about other options for the mouse problem.

The remaining week was vet time. All animals were checked, the horses, dogs and chickens. The cattle had been looked after the week before, there were just a few check-ups due after some treatments. Magina liked the vet because she never cared about people. She focused on the animals so much that she almost never looked at the humans. At first he had assumed it was only him, that she didn't look at him because of his history but she did it with everyone. Magina had seen her do it on the market in town and that had been the moment he had decided he liked her. Because she just didn't care about humans and their stories. Except when they had to do with animals of course. But even when she was talking to a person she almost always petted a dog or cat or something in the meantime. She was always surrounded by one pet or the other. As if they were drawn to her, knew how much she cared for them.

It was expensive to have the vet come over but it was necessary. And it was good, because Magina sometimes missed the signs of an illness, as much as he tried to see everything. And it was something he was willing to pay for and which he did gladly. He'd rather buy less for himself than skip a vet week.

Calving season came and Magina was on his feet almost twenty-four seven. He slept outside, near the cattle, only leaving for short periods of time to eat and look after the other animals. He was glad that the cats had adapted quickly and could mostly fend for themselves. This was hard work with little time to sleep. So whenever there was a break, Magina slept. No matter what time of day or where he was. He simply lay down at a place that wasn't too uncomfortable, which just meant not rocks.

Maybe he should think about hiring help. He had been alone for a very long time now and it would be so much easier to do all the work when he could split it with a second person. But then he'd have to see whoever it was every day, would have to talk with them and stuff. Magina wasn't sure if he wanted that. It seemed constricting somehow. He didn't want to always have someone around, he liked being alone.

At that he thought of Kael. He sighed. He knew nothing about the man other than that he was beautiful. And that he liked kissing him. He couldn't know if he'd like to have him around. Maybe Kael was dumb. Or strange. Or vain. Or didn't like to get his hands dirty. He could as well be some pampered rich boy, considering the extravagant clothes he had worn.

Finding that out would require time. Something Magina didn't have. He sighed again. He couldn't even be sure if the man wanted to spend time together or just wanted to get laid. If it was the latter, Magina with his actual state of only having kissed someone, once, was probably not the best option for a satisfactory lay.

With having no phone to call Kael he supposed it might be a moot issue the next time they met.

This night Magina stared at the stars. He lay on his back in the grass, arms crossed under his head, a dog curled up on each of his sides. He was tired but it had been a quiet day (for calving) and he wasn't able to fall asleep. His thoughts circled around Kael. Magina felt almost obsessed, the way he couldn't stop thinking about the man. But he couldn't help it. He knew that it was all imagination, that the man was probably not half as perfect as he made him in these fantasies, but his heart nonetheless ached because he knew that he couldn't be in any kind of relationship with him. How would it be like, to lie here, side by side, together with him? To talk, to hold hands, to cuddle? To kiss underneath the stars? He dreamt about it this night and when he opened his eyes and Kael wasn't there, he was confused. It took a few moments for him to wake up and realize that it hadn't been real.

Magina sat in the grass and rubbed his eyes. The sun was just rising on a cloudless sky. His stomach growled. One of his dogs patted over and nuzzled his arm. The other was still dozing while three had remained on the ranch. For about a minute he indulged in the remains of the dream, in the feeling of happiness and contentment. Then he pushed it all away and got up to do the day's work. The most stressful part of the calving season was over but that didn't mean he could slack off now.

When the next market was held in town, Magina wasn't able to go. There had been a problem with some of the cattle and the vet was there. And in addition to it, he had found a part of the fence that needed to be repaired. Stuff he couldn't, no matter how much he might want to, postpone. He'd have to go into town on a different day to buy the things he needed. He couldn't leave now.

It was about a week later before he had actually the time to drive away for a few hours. Still he was anxious all the time and was back as fast as he could. A few of his cows were sick and Magina had to keep an eye on them.

At least his mice problem had gotten better, the cats being more helpful than he had expected. There were still mice around, of course, but not so many and they weren't in the house anymore. And the cats also helped to keep birds away from his garden, something that he had taken for granted until now, having birds eat berries and seeds.

All in all, though it was exhausting, the ranch went astonishingly well. And when the next market was, Magina went to sell cattle. It had been a year since he had been there, a year since he had kissed Kael in the parking lot, next to his car, for everyone to see. One year since the man had told him to call, which he hadn't done.

First business. Then shopping. And then he walked over to the rodeo circuit, leaving his two dogs at the truck. Magina was unsure what he'd do. Would he just watch and leave? Did he actually want to talk to Kael? Maybe he should apologize and explain. He stayed at the back, trying to find the man while being in a place where he couldn't be spotted too easily. But as soon as he saw Kael, he just had to get closer. While doing so, he moved towards the entrance of the circle, where the man would get out once he was finished. He just couldn't stay away. The man was amazing. Even more than Magina remembered. The dreams he'd had throughout the last year had definitely gotten less frequent, the image of Kael duller, diffuse.

Now that he saw him, Magina felt the need to talk to him. He wanted to apologize, wanted to explain. And so he waited. It seemed Kael took his time before leaving the circle and his horse. Magina didn't have that much time to dally around but this was important to him. Then he'd just sleep an hour less the next night to catch up on the time he had been in town (which was hard considering how little he already slept). But some things were more important than sleep.

Kael spotted him directly as he left. He didn't react other than faltering in his steps for a split second. He didn't come over, didn't smile, nothing, just kept walking. He was probably angry at him. At least Magina would understand if the man was. He followed Kael, who spun around as soon as he realized it.

"Oh, now you wait?" Kael looked at Magina with indifference but at least he had stopped.

They were in the middle of a path through the market, people all around them. "Um, can we go somewhere more private, please?"

The request got him a haughty look but then Kael nodded. He turned without a word and so Magina just followed. They walked away from the market further into town until only very occasionally a person was seen. They were probably all on the market.

"What do you want?" Kael crossed his arms in front of his chest. His hat shaded his eyes but Magina could still see the frown.

He knew what he wanted to say but at the first try the words got kind of stuck. He cleared his throat and tried again. "I wanted to apologize. For not calling. I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you the last time but you were gone too fast. I don't have a phone, I couldn't call."

The frown deepened. "You are kidding me. Everyone has a phone."

"I don't."

"Okay, maybe." He didn't sound as if he believed it. "But there has to be a phone on the farm. And the others working there must have phones. You could've borrowed one."

"I swear to you, there is no phone on the farm. Nowhere." He didn't say anything about there being no others. Though, now that he thought about it, maybe he could've borrowed the phone of his vet for a few minutes. Well, too late for that now.

"Where do you live? Out in the sticks? How can no one on your farm have a phone?" Anger seeped into his voice. He clearly didn't believe him.

"It is true, I'm sorry. Otherwise I would've at least called to tell you I have no time to meet with you. I'm not an arsehole." Kael didn't look convinced. He leaned against the wall of a house at his back, arms still crossed.

"You would've told me you have no time."

"Yes. I can't leave the farm for a few hours. Market about twice a year is the absolute limit. I'm sorry, I would've really liked to meet you and get to know you."

"I know there is a lot of work on a farm, but there is always free time as well. I'm not sure if you are telling the truth because it seems so unimaginable."

"I am! Why would I not call you? I'd do anything with you if I could. You are the most beautiful and breath-taking man I've ever seen! If I could, I would've stayed last time, I'd have called as often as you wanted me to, I'd stay today. But I can't. I have responsibilities and I can't just skirt them." Truth had to be a rare thing among people. Magina couldn't remember how it had been on the farm, before. Had they lied? Had they not spoken their thoughts? He didn't know. But he could see how the truth, how what he said affected Kael. It was like before, when he had told him about the dreams. The man seemed stunned by the words. Did no one ever tell him how gorgeous he was? Or didn't people tell each other things like that? Did he have to imply it somehow, mask it within other topics? He didn't know and he didn't care. There was nothing wrong with telling the truth or revealing one's thoughts.

His opinion only hardened when Kael grabbed him by his arms and spun them around, so Magina was pressed against the wall. Before his mind could see this as some kind of assault and react to it, the man kissed him. He brushed one hand through Magina's hair, knocking his hat off in the process, and almost immediately deepened the kiss.

Magina's head swam by this sudden action but he kissed back instantly. His body responded without conscious thought, pressing against Kael. The wall at his back gave him good footing as he tried to get closer. It felt amazing and he moaned into the kiss as his body responded to all the sensations. He grabbed Kael's shirt at his back, fisting both hands into the fabric.

The kiss was amazing. Not that Magina had any other kisses to compare it to, but he felt lightheaded and hot and hard within mere seconds. What Kael did with his tongue, how he sucked and licked, how he stroked in and out of Magina's mouth, how he moved his lips, it was perfect. Magina tried to keep up, to give as much as he got but his thoughts were hazy, at best. His hips rubbed against Kael's, feeling the hardness there and he just wanted to get more of it. He knew that if he kept that up, he'd come soon. But no matter how embarrassing that would be, he couldn't stop.

Especially when Kael began to move his hips, too, and panted, his moans so soft they were almost inaudible. Every tiny sound sent sparks through his body and made his cock twitch. He had never felt like that before. And then Kael pushed one hand into Magina's pants and squeezed his arse. He had to break the kiss or he'd never get enough air into his lungs. His breaths were harsh and too uneven and it felt so good he couldn't contain his moans of pleasure. He buried his face in the man's hair (when had he discarded his hat?). It smelled like sun and horse and something different, something nice, probably his shampoo or something.

Accidentally Magina brushed against Kael's ear with his lips. The answer to it was a jerk, a shudder and a moan. Just to see if this was a positive or a negative reaction, he did it again, this time deliberately, even licking over the shell with the tip of his tongue. The answer this time was definitely positive as Kael pushed his other hand into Magina's pants and pulled their hips together tightly, circling and pushing, his movements getting faster and more erratic. He couldn't concentrate on Kael's ears anymore but he kept his face where it was, his breath ghosting over the tip of the ear with every gasp.

Kael shuddered, then he moaned softly and with another shudder he came. Magina knew it but he would've needed just a minute more to follow. Now he wasn't sure what to do. Kael was completely motionless except for one shudder after the other while Magina thought his head might explode. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to wait this out. All tension left the man and he slumped against Magina, his forehead resting against the wall at his back.

That had been… too good to be described with words. But Magina was still in a haze, he was still hard and though he was unbelievably proud to have brought this beautiful man to orgasm, without even being naked or something, he was aching all over and just wanted to get off. He would've rubbed himself off, just there, but Kael still held him too tightly to get a hand between their bodies or to move his hips.

"Hey Sunstrider!"

A voice from somewhere behind them made Kael startle. He straightened and spun around while Magina was still collecting his thoughts and trying to get his body back under control. Suddenly he was very aware of where they were. In the middle of the town. In a side alley but still right there, in the open. Oh shit.

"Sunstrider, what the hell are you doing here? Go somewhere more private!" There was a second man with the one who had called first, and now they both laughed.

"Looks like you had some fun here!" They laughed again.

"What do you want?" Kael sounded slightly annoyed.

"I was sent to look for you. The next rodeo begins in half an hour and you haven't shown up yet to take your place." A pause. "You should consider changing your pants, first, though."

With another laugh, the two strode away. "See you later, sunny-boy!" One of them called before blowing a kiss at Kael.

Magina was still leaning against the wall. He hadn't seen much of the two, had been half hidden behind Kael's back. He supposed whatever they had been doing here was over, no matter the state of his body. He'd simply take care of it at home. Or maybe, in his truck. He bent down to take his hat when he was hit by a sudden realization: The two men just now, they had called Kael 'Sunstrider'.

Dread formed in his gut as he got up again. Kael had turned back and taken his hat, as well, but hadn't put it back on. He held it in his hands and smiled some half smile. "Um, sorry for that." He grimaced a little. "Well, sorry for all of it. I got carried away, I know better than to fool around in the middle of town. And, um, sorry for, well, let's say, losing it." He looked at his hat and then low-key moved it over his crotch, where a telltale wet spot had formed.

It all didn't matter and Magina barely registered what Kael was saying. He had only one thing on his mind now. "You are a Sunstrider?"

With his grin gone and a frown on his face, the man nodded. "Yes, why? Is something wrong?" He must've picked up on the change in Magina's behaviour. There was something wrong, definitely. It was the fact that he had just been kissing a Sunstrider. Had been rubbing against him and made him come! A Sunstrider.

He had to get out of here. The arousal was gone, all good feelings were gone, replaced by things like disgust and anger. Hate. Magina wasn't sure yet if he hated himself or only the man in front of him, but he knew that he had to get away. This…

He straightened. "Don't ever come near me again." He pulled his hat low over his face and walked past Kael, careful not to touch him.

"What?" Kael blinked, not comprehending what was happening. "Why? What's the matter? It… I already said I'm sorry!"

Since he didn't slow down or anything, Kael almost yelled the last words. It wasn't about what had happened just now, it was about what had happened a decade ago. He had buried it deep enough so it wouldn't affect his everyday life, even though everything on the farm reminded him of before. But every time he met a Sunstrider, it resurfaced. He hadn't known Kael was one of them, he was too young for him to remember, Magina guessed. He must've been a boy, then, just like him.

He didn't remember how he got back home. His mind had shut off and he had driven his truck without even thinking about it. He greeted his dogs and let them bring him to the ground where he cuddled with all of them. Usually he didn't have very much time to pet them and play with them, but now he took this time. He needed it, needed the connection to another living being that he called friend. The five were happy about the attention. Magina pulled himself together for the remaining day, doing his chores and looking after all his animals. But when he lay in bed late that night, the memories came flooding back.

It had been a long time since Magina had left a light on during the night, but today he couldn't bear the darkness. He lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling. How could that have happened? How could he have fallen for a Sunstrider?

Sleep didn't come easily and then Magina was plagued by nightmares. Until in one of them, Kael appeared. At first Magina was sure this was all getting worse but strangely, the man took him by his hand, in the middle of fire and chaos and death, and just led him away. Magina was, even in his dream, too stunned by this turn of events not to follow the Sunstrider. As soon as they had left the farm with all the horrors happening, the dream changed, from a nightmare to the all too familiar erotic dream.

The dream was more intense than before, which was surely because of what they had done in town. And because the memories where fresh. After the nightmare, Magina sank into the comfort this dream gave him.

Only when he woke up was he disgusted by himself and by his weak mind. He was aroused but for nothing in the world would he jerk off to the image of a Sunstrider in his head. The fact that he'd done so for over a year now was pushed far away. He couldn't change anything about that now but he didn't have to go on with it like before. Not now that he knew who Kael was.

Magina wasn't sure if he dreaded the nightmares or the erotic dreams more when he fell into bed the following night. With every night in which he dreamt, which was almost every night, he was more on edge. Of course some mornings he couldn't remember but on way too many he could and he hated his mind for giving him all these images about Kael. And his body for reacting to them so strongly. He couldn't really do anything about it though, he couldn't make himself stop dreaming. He tried, he tried to change the dreams, tried to push his thoughts about Kael so far into the back of his mind that they couldn't crawl back, but it was no use. His dream-self _wanted_ to be with Kael. And it cared nothing about the wishes of the awake-self.

As it had been before, when the memory faded, the dreams grew less intense. But they didn't go away.

Everything else was fine. The farm was good and the animals were, too. Magina was actually proud about what he accomplished every day. It was hard, no doubt, but it payed off.


	4. Chapter 4

The next market day was his. Magina needed supplies and so he drove into town. He wouldn't go to the rodeo circuit today, this was over. He'd get what he needed and leave again. Easy. He even left all his dogs at home to get it over with quicker.

It took longer than he had intended to find the stuff he had on his list. By the time he was finished, his stomach was growling but to go to the part of the market where he could get something to eat would bring him too close to the rodeo. He'd eat back at home.

Magina frowned when he saw someone leaning against his truck. A cowboy, dark pants and light shirt, a colt on his belt, his hat pulled low over his face. He had his booted feet crossed at the ankles and read something.

Before he could ask the cowboy what he was doing there at his truck, the man looked up. Magina stopped dead in his tracks. He hadn't recognized Kael because he had never looked normal like he did now. He only knew him in fancy rodeo clothes.

"Go away." Without looking at him, Magina walked past the man to put all his stuff on the truck bed. But Kael was still there when he turned back. He had put whatever he had been reading away and had straightened. But he hadn't left. "Leave me alone!" Magina didn't want to see the man, didn't want to talk to him. He knew that his dreams would become more vivid again and he could well do without that. And the way his body already reacted, the way his heart bet faster, it made him angry. How could he feel attracted like that to a Sunstrider?

And then the stupid man shook his head. "I want to know what went wrong last time. Was it something I said? Or did? Did I go too far? I'm sorry for that, it won't happen again if it makes you uncomfortable."

Great, now he evoked images and feelings, memories. "It's because you are a Sunstrider. I told you, now go." Magina ground the words out through clenched teeth. He had balled his hands into fists, the anger at his body's reaction growing into fury. And since the reason for it all stood right in front of him, he felt the urge to punch the man. Over and over into his beautiful face until he stopped dreaming about him all the time. Until his body didn't get aroused by him anymore. It was madness.

"My name? Why does my name bother you?"

He didn't stop. He didn't go away. And Magina had enough. With a low growl, he attacked. He swung his fists (of course he didn't use his weapons, he wouldn't want to kill the man) but Kael was fast. He evaded the attack and stepped to the side. The next attack came fast and Magina's knuckle grazed Kael's cheek. He saw surprise in the man's eyes and then he was gone. Vanished. He stared at the place where the man had just been but there was nothing, no trace of him.

At his back! Magina felt his presence more than anything else and blinked forward, out of Kael's reach. He turned, blinked back and was stopped in front of a thin wall of ice that had materialized out of thin air. Magina stared at the wall, then at the man right behind it. Before he could react to this display of magic (how he hated magic!), Kael had walked through the wall without it affecting him the least. He grabbed Magina's wrists and shoved him against his truck. Magina swore he felt a gust of wind assist the man and he was sure that otherwise he wouldn't have been able to pin Magina that easily. The air was heavy with the smell of magic.

Here he was, pinned against his own truck by Kael Sunstrider. He supposed this was of his own making, since he had attacked and all, but it didn't dim his fury any that he was helpless now. That he had lost this fight. He tried to break out of the hold but he couldn't. He tried to twist away and when that didn't work either, wanted to kick. Kael must've read his intention because he pushed his whole body against Magina, trapping him completely and rendering him incapable of moving even an inch.

They were too close now, though, and Magina's body reacted instantly. He growled and stared at Kael. "Let me go!"

"I'm not sure that is a good idea. I don't really trust you not to punch me."

Magina just stared daggers. Of course he would've tried to punch the man a second time. That was one of the reasons he wanted to be released. He shifted, tried to break free again. But the only thing it did was make him absolutely aware of how their bodies were pressed together. He couldn't get away like that.

"If you promise not to attack me again, I'll release you."

This was awful. This show of power, it was so typical for a Sunstrider it only fuelled Magina's fury. And he should promise him not to attack? Promise anything at all? "No way."

Kael frowned and his eyes wandered over his face. He was looking for something, but Magina didn't care. Then the man's gaze dropped to Magina's mouth. And got stuck there. Kael licked his lips and all of a sudden, Magina's heartbeat quickened. He had tried to keep his body's reactions in check, but this was too much.

The closeness made Magina feel when Kael grew hard against him. He swallowed, knew that the man would be able to feel his erection in a second or two. Treacherous thing, why did it have to respond to a Sunstrider when all Magina felt towards the man was hatred? His body didn't care about that in the least, though.

Then Kael's eyes flickered back to his, their gazes locked. There was surprise on his features. For the longest time they silently stared at each other. Magina tried to appear unaffected, defiant, tried to keep the hatred visible in his eyes. But when Kael's gaze dropped to his mouth and he leaned closer, Magina lost the fight against his body. He couldn't help it as he met Kael halfway.

The first brushing of their lips was hesitant, as if Kael wasn't sure, which he probably wasn't. And rightly so. But even this was enough to make Magina forget all the hate he felt towards the Sunstriders. He moaned softly and wanted to get his hands free to pull Kael closer, to hold him so he could deepen the kiss. He was still trapped but the movement made their hips rub against each other. He moaned again and then Kael was there. Kissing the man was better than Magina remembered and he wished this moment would never stop.

As soon as his arms were free, due to Kael framing Magina's face with his hands, he buried one hand in the soft blond strands. With the other he grabbed his arse. He wanted more friction and so he held him while rubbing their hips together. It was madness but it felt too good not to.

When Kael broke the kiss to take a few deep breaths, Magina opened his eyes. He hissed and pushed Kael away on the sudden realization that they were, _again_ , making out right there in the open! On the parking place from the market!

He hid his face in his hands, not daring to look around and find someone staring at them. How had this happened? How could he have lost himself again like this? And then, with a Sunstrider. Shame welled up, paired with the resurfacing anger and fury. But over it all hovered the desire to keep going and never stop.

He felt lost. And when he looked up, confused by all the emotions coursing through him, he could see the same confusion mirrored back at him from Kael's face. Without any conscious thought, he climbed into his truck and left. As he drove from the parking lot, Kael was still standing at the same spot, staring after Magina in his truck.

For the remaining day, he tried to keep his body so occupied that his mind couldn't drift off. It worked astonishingly well. But as soon as he was in bed, it was all there.

The memory of Kael had him almost instantly hard and he just couldn't push it away today. He was exhausted, mentally. And so, this one night, he let his thoughts swirl around Kael and everything they had done together while he took himself into his hand. He came within minutes with a harsh groan. And hated himself for this weakness afterwards. He didn't want to be attracted to the man. He wanted him out of his mind. If it just were that easy.

Because Kael had waited for him at his truck, Magina was now afraid to go into town. He knew that this attraction between them would still be there. To hate the Sunstrider was obviously not enough to make it go away. Even his display of magic hadn't been enough.

The dreams were back with high intensity and about every second night Magina woke up with the need to jerk off. All in all, it made him ill-tempered and cranky. Because he didn't want to be hard after dreaming about a Sunstrider!

When the vet came over, he even snapped at her. Magina had never snapped at her before, for nothing. Because, really, aside from the fact she was the only human being coming to his ranch, she was always friendly and nice. She was always there when he needed a vet. Reliable.

He blushed and lowered his head. "Sorry." He sighed. "I don't feel very well at the moment. I didn't want to be unfriendly."

And the vet looked at him. She never did that, not for such a long time at least. But now she stared. She didn't say anything. As she transferred her attention back to the dog in front of her, she just nodded slightly and continued her work.

Magina didn't feel like it had been enough, he felt really bad for letting his bad temper make him be impolite towards her. So he apologized about a thousand times while she was around until the vet couldn't take it anymore. She rolled her eyes and faced him. "It's all right. Everyone has a bad day once in a while, it's not such a big deal. I appreciate your apologies but you can stop now. I'm used to much worse, I can take it. Please let me do my work here, I'll call when I'm finished."

She raised her brows as Magina opened his mouth to apologize again. He closed it without saying a word. Silently he watched for a few more moments before he headed back to his duties. He never lingered around when the vet was over, he had enough stuff to do. He was off-balance, though, and didn't feel like himself. He tried to keep his thoughts Kael-free, but it just didn't work. The man had gotten to him, Sunstrider or not, and he couldn't get him out of his head. It was the most frustrating thing he had ever experienced.

"I heard rumours." Magina had given the vet her money and thought she'd leave. She didn't. She leaned against the front of her quad, hands braced on the hood behind her.

"What rumours?" He didn't care about gossip but when the vet mentioned something it might just be important. Maybe something about land? Or cattle? Or the weather?

"About you."

Now that was new. He hadn't been the topic of conversations for a long time, had tried really hard to be forgotten. He hadn't done anything now, had he? "Why?"

The vet raised her brows. "Really? You have to ask?"

Oh no. Magina knew what he had done. Not that they had been subtle or anything. The middle of the town, the parking place of the market… But it meant someone had recognized him. Great, what a perfect gossip story, him and a Sunstrider. It was probably the most interesting topic now. He almost didn't ask in fear of the answer. "What do the rumours say?"

"Not much," the vet answered with a hint of a smile. "Just that you've been seen smooching around with the youngest Sunstrider. They all knew the boy was gay but he has never been seen, has been keeping it a well-hidden secret. But they wonder about you now. Why the Sunstrider has gotten so careless. And why you got involved with him in the first place."

Great, the whole town knew. Which meant Kael would know who he was by now, too. His family would be thrilled, no doubt. At least it would be enough for the man to stay away from him.

Everyone was talking about him! Magina buried his face in his hands and groaned.

"Don't worry, our town isn't that rigid, you being gay won't matter."

As if that was his problem. He couldn't care less if the whole world knew he was gay. It was his past that was the problem! He hated the Sunstriders, he didn't want to be connected to them. He didn't even want to think of them! But all his life currently centred on _was_ a Sunstrider. It made him crazy.

With a friendly pat on the shoulder and a smile the vet left.

The following days were a flurry of activity and though he had little time to sleep, the action calmed Magina. He knew what to do in any case of emergency, with any problem that occurred. It centred him and it made him proud of what he had accomplished. He had learned much over the last years, and most of it all on his own. At the beginning when something had gone wrong he had been a wreck. But now all that was left was some weariness from too little sleep and from too much physical labour.

This evening, he took his time as he washed down by the river. He'd had only sparsely had time to clean himself and his stuff but today was better. The water was cold and as he stepped out of it he felt refreshed. He sat down by the water and let his feet dangle while his body dried in the setting sun. It was beautiful. All five of his dogs were with him and they raced around him, enjoying the cool as much as Magina did. On the way back he actually walked instead of blinking. He felt almost relaxed today.

The wet clothes hung outside to dry and Magina had just put on some pants when he heard a truck pull into his driveway. He frowned. Who was that? He hadn't sent for the vet and he didn't get visitors. Without a shirt, just in pants and boots (and hat of course) he stepped out of the house. His dogs were already racing towards the truck, barking and jumping.

With a whistle they came back, gathering in front of the porch. Magina pushed his hat a little back to see more. He didn't know the truck. But he recognized the person climbing out of it immediately. And regretted that he hadn't put on a shirt. What did _he_ want here?

Magina stepped down from the porch and approached Kael Sunstrider. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and stopped far enough away from the man to signal, without any doubt, that he wanted to keep a safe distance between them. He wouldn't get aggressive and therefore didn't want Kael to get too close, either.

The man looked too good to be true, though. Dark pants, almost black but with a hint of purple and a plaid shirt in white and purple. It seemed those were his colours because he always wore a combination of the three. He had the sleeves of the shirt rolled up and one front corner was tucked into the pants, showing the belt as well as the holster with the gun. His hair was partly bound into a ponytail and he held a dark brown (not purple) hat in the hand.

Of course Magina's stupid body had to react just to the sight of the man with increased heartbeat and an annoying flutter in the stomach. He tried not to show it, though. He waited, didn't want to talk first, especially since he didn't know what to say other than how beautiful he thought Kael was or how much he hated him. Both were probably not the best starters for a conversation.

"Um, hi." Kael smiled a bit but when Magina only stared back the smile vanished again. Magina wasn't sure if he should be happy about it or sad.

"I won't bother you for long, I just wanted to tell you that I heard stories about you. And your past. And that there are rumours about us. About you. And that I'm sorry for that. I didn't want to pull you into some gossip thing." He lowered his eyes and turned the hat slowly round in his hands.

"I already know that." The man could've saved himself the trouble of driving all the way out here.

There was surprise on his features as Kael looked up again. "Really? Okay." His gaze dropped from Magina's face down to his naked upper body. His crossed arms didn't hide all of him and he felt strangely exposed. When he could see the first flicker of desire in Kael's eyes, the flutter in his stomach got more persistent.

"Get out of here." He didn't want to experience what had happened last time, again. No matter what his body said, it had wrecked his mind. Especially that it had been so easy for Kael, first to pin him and then to make him react that way. It was disgusting.

Kael made a step forward and Magina instantly stepped back.

"Get out."

Kael frowned but didn't move.

"I don't want you here. I don't want to see you ever again. Don't touch me, don't talk to me. I already told you that but I'll just say it again: Leave me alone."

"Are you sure?"

Magina snorted. "Of course I am! Otherwise I wouldn't say it!"

With a nod, Kael went back to his truck. When he wanted to climb inside, he stopped. "You know, I've never lost control like when I'm with you. Something about you is different and you get to me. You are gorgeous and it'll be hard for me to stay away. I had kind of hoped you'd talk to me today. I don't really understand what happened to you or this ranch and how my family was involved but I was a kid then. I had hoped we could talk and you'd see that. That I had nothing to do with whatever happened. I would've really liked to get to know you and to explore this, let's say, energy, between us. I will do as you wish, though." He took a deep breath, then he looked around, once. "You should get help on the ranch. Or the whole thing might fall on your head, sometime." Kael swung inside of his truck and closed the door. For a moment it looked as if he wanted to say something more, but then he just smiled, sad but oh so beautiful.

And after what he had said, this smile made Magina's heart almost burst from his chest.

The conversation had been awfully civilized. A part of him had hoped it would escalate. This would've been the first time they were in private and the possibilities of not getting interrupted… Magina growled at himself in annoyance about these thoughts and trudged back into the house. The words haunted him, though. Of course Magina knew that Kael had been a child, as he had been himself. But the Sunstriders were all able to wield magic and that alone was enough to hate them. All of them, no matter if they had been involved then or not.


	5. Chapter 5

Strangely enough, Magina trusted Kael to stick to his words and stay away from him as he drove into town the next time. If he was sad about it, he pushed it away. He didn't want to see the man.

He caught himself more than once scanning the people around him for a glimpse of Kael, but he wasn't there. On his way back to the truck, two of his dogs by his side today, he thought he saw someone leaning against the vehicle. His heart skipped a beat. Why could his body not be on the same page with his mind? He didn't want to see Kael! And he really hoped that, when he kept repeating this over and over in his head, his body would catch up with it and finally be quite.

But the man standing there wasn't Kael. And there was a second one. What was going on now? Weary, Magina approached them. The dogs picked up on Magina's tension and stayed close, alert, watchful.

The two men appeared to be normal cowboys, though their clothes were extremely clean and new-looking. Since it was market, maybe this was just their best stuff. One of the men said something to the other who then looked over at Magina. He smiled and spread his fingers at his sides. Suddenly two fire elementals appeared by his side and his smile widened. Magina instantly knew that this was a Sunstrider. The magic and the smile. The man didn't look like Kael but the smile was… similar.

The smell of magic was heavy around them and it was difficult for Magina to breathe. As if the air was too thick, laced with magic as it was, and he couldn't get it into his lungs. Strange, that it hadn't been like that when Kael had fought him and had used magic.

Magina wasn't sure how to react. The two men and the two spirits surrounded him, the men at the front and the spirits at his back. His dogs turned to watch his back. They didn't snarl or anything, which was a good sign, Magina supposed.

"So you are the Turstarkuri boy." The man who had created the spirits spoke to him while the other just watched. They were doing something, magic Magina couldn't see. But he felt it, knew it. And from minute to minute he grew more uneasy as he faced the two Sunstriders. Maybe he should just blink out and drive away, leave them standing there. He didn't want a confrontation with them and they appeared to be out for one. For whatever reason. "We heard you've been compromising our brother."

Compromising, really? Magina almost rolled his eyes. "What do you want? Me to stay away from your brother? Deal. We already agreed not to see each other again, so there will be no further 'compromising'."

The man in front of him frowned. "What is your problem?"

"My problem? I don't have a problem! You go around, cornering others without a reason to do so! Sunstrider." The last word definitely sounded like an insult, as it was meant to be.

"You are not cornered. You'd know if you were." And with the scent of magic getting even stronger, the man built a wall of fire, around them. They were completely surrounded by it and it was just high enough that Magina wasn't able to see above it. It wasn't hot, not like a real fire, but it was warm. And the flickering of the flames as well as the warmth and the sense that there was fire everywhere, it triggered memories of that night.

It wasn't the first time Magina was caught in the memories of that night and he knew what caused these flashbacks. He knew that he had to act fast.

As soon as the wall of fire built around him, without any delay, he blinked out of it. With a second blink he was inside of his truck. The fire was still there, too near, to big, all too real.

Magina lay down on the backseat and stared at the roof, trying to blend the fire outside of his truck out. He'd have closed his eyes but he knew what he'd see then. He couldn't think but he had to. His heart was racing, and not in a good way. His hands were sweaty, his breathing too uneven and way too fast. He had learned, right at the beginning, how to deal with this but it was so, so hard. He had always been alone, had been forced to learn to cope on his own. Having the dogs around helped, but right now he couldn't get up to get them inside of the truck and he couldn't get out to them because of the fire. Just great.

He hated that this was his weakness, that it always came back to him.

"Hey, you think you can get away like that? We weren't finished!"

The fire was now around the truck. The fact that the two Sunstriders had cornered him like that and now wouldn't leave him alone, even when he had just tried to get away without a fight or anything, it made him unbelievably angry. Why did they have to do this? To threaten him with the one thing he feared? They could've come with anything and it wouldn't have mattered. The smell of magic might've brought back memories, too, but not like that! Shortly he wondered if they knew and had done it on purpose but it didn't matter.

"Come out here or we'll come inside and drag you out! There are things we want to say to you!"

And now they threatened him with words, too. That was enough. The fear was replaced by anger in a rush. He wasn't the small boy from then anymore, who wasn't able to defend himself. Who could only sit and listen and hope all would be over soon and he'd still be alive. No. He had meditated, had learned to use his fear instead of succumbing to it. And he did it now. The fear transformed into anger and into strength.

The two had cornered the wrong person. In a moment of clarity, Magina didn't pull his revolver but only took two small curved knives from his belt, one in each hand. He didn't want to kill them, just wanted for them to leave him alone.

Then the fight began. Magina blinked out of the truck and landed behind the men. He had forgotten about the two fire spirits, though. Lucky for him, he was way faster than the two. The looked fearsome and strong but they were not very fast. With a few hits of the knives, he had the first one eliminated. It vanished into a pile of ash. The fire of the creature didn't burn him, it wasn't even very hot.

As then men realized what had happened, they turned around but now the dogs were there, too. Magina blinked away then behind one of the men, hitting him in the temple with the hilt of the knife. The dogs distracted the other one and Magina used the time to get to the second fire spirit. When he turned back around, he saw one of his dogs frozen and the other immobilized by an unseen force.

He hoped that they were fine but a fresh wave of rage tore through him. He didn't even see the fire all around them anymore, he was completely focused on the threat in front of him. The man used the same trick as Kael had: he vanished. But they were brothers and Magina suspected the same move as the one he already knew. He waited a split second and then he dropped low, kicking at the feet of the men he assumed was behind him. He connected and only then did he blink away. He couldn't really fight against someone who was invisible.

The man reappeared a little to the side and when he saw Magina, he attacked for real now. It was a flurry of magical spells but Magina was prepared and he was fast. He dodged and blinked, almost faster than the Sunstrider could react. And then he was behind the man. He debated if he should just hold him and try to find out why they had cornered him, if 'compromising' Kael had really been this horrible for them and their family. But he didn't really care so he just knocked him out the same as he had done with his brother.

In the same moment the man dropped to the ground lifelessly, the fire died and the two dogs were free again. They seemed a bit dazed but unharmed. Magina sheathed the knives and dropped to his knees to cuddle the two quickly. Then he ordered them into the truck, not onto the truck bed, and drove as fast away from the parking place and the market and the town as possible.

There had been people gathered outside of the ring of fire and they had stared at Magina. But no one had approached him and he hadn't wanted to make eye contact, had tried to remain unrecognized. Which was probably dumb, because someone had to know and then everyone would know.

After the rumours coursing around, it should've been clear that 'remaining unrecognized' was close to impossible. And sure enough, about two hours later, in which Magina had unloaded the truck and had washed and changed his clothes, he heard someone approaching the ranch.

Knowing what it was about, he took his weapons with him, the colt as well as the knives, as he left the house. It was only one truck and he recognized it. It was Kael's. Great, did he come now to accuse him of beating his brothers up? Magina was still wound up from the encounter, all the fire around him and the magic. He could still smell it, which was why he had changed. He thought it had lingered on his clothes and skin. But it was probably the situation, combined with the memories from the past it had refreshed.

It all together was probably the reason why he attacked Kael as soon as the man had left the truck. And this time he was prepared for what the Sunstrider was able to do. He had him pushed against the truck within seconds, one of his knives pressed against his neck.

Kael was clearly surprised by the attack. As he tried to move and felt the edge of the knife, his eyes flickered over Magina's face. Maybe he was searching for clues if he meant it. If this was real, if he'd cut him if he made a wrong movement. What he saw was probably not what he had wished for, because he remained completely motionless in Magina's grip. Did he look that angry and serious?

Not that it mattered. He had just been cornered by Kael's brothers, and he'd had to fight his way free because they wouldn't leave him alone. He _was_ angry. And whatever Kael had come to tell him, he didn't want to hear it.

But as always, being this close to Kael affected him. All the emotions he had felt earlier, with the aftereffect still lingering, made him unstable and somehow unable to control himself. His heartbeat accelerated and the flutter in his stomach appeared and together with his anger it was irrepressible.

It was obvious that Kael hadn't been on the rodeo circuit today. He looked as if he had actually worked. His hair was tied back, out of his face, practical. His shirt was old, worn, and dirty, as were his pants. His hat was an older one, too. The colours were muted, though the shirt was purple. He even had a streak of dirt on his forehead, from wiping the sweat away with his hands. It all made him more substantial, more real.

There was no fear in his eyes as Magina leaned closer, bringing more of his weight against him and against the knife at his throat.

"I apologize for my brothers." Kael's voice was low and almost… tired. "They had no right to corner you and if I had known what they had planned I'd have stopped them."

"I was perfectly able to stop them on my own."

A slow smile appeared on Kael's face. "I know. I heard as much."

Was he pleased? Magina frowned.

"They deserved it and I'm glad you put them into their place. Without actually hurting them. Thank you." Kael moved his arm and wrapped his hand around Magina's wrist, the one where he was holding the knife. He didn't try to pull him away or something, he just held his wrist.

They stood like that, way too close and it brought back the other times they had been this close. Magina knew that he had to step back, that he had to bring some space between them. But he couldn't. His gaze wandered to Kael's mouth and he remembered how good it had felt to kiss him.

He should get away, best would be to blink away so he would be gone faster. But this pull he had felt towards Kael right from the first time he had seen him, it was irresistible today.

Kael's eyes widened and then Magina was kissing him. He pushed him against the truck harder and now Kael pulled at his wrist to get the knife away. Magina threw it to the side, then used the now free hand to pull Kael's hair free.

The kiss was frantic and urgent, Magina felt as if he couldn't get enough. They were already touching from head to toes but it didn't suffice. He felt as if he was drowning and Kael was his air. He just _needed_. And the way the man responded, the way he kissed back and clutched at Magina, tried to pull him closer still, it spoke of the same.

One hand remained in Kael's hair, it was just so soft, but with the other he pulled Kael's shirt up and pushed underneath. The way they pressed together, there wasn't much he could touch, but he could run his hand up over his side and his shoulder. When he got caught in the fabric he broke the kiss in an impatient groan. He used both hands to push it over Kael's head, who raised his arms without hesitation. His eyes were burning with desire and his breath came in harsh pants. His hair dishevelled and his lips already deep red from kissing, he was gorgeous.

Before they resumed kissing, and had to break off again later, Magina pulled his own shirt off, too. He didn't give his mind time to catch up and maybe stop this. And as they touched, skin against skin like that for the first time, his mind wouldn't be able to stop him.

It was amazing. Magina would've never thought that it could be like that, to be naked with someone. Was it always like that? Or was it Kael?

With a harsh groan, Magina resumed kissing Kael. Only now he felt the man's hands on his back, on his arms, stroking over his skin. It was amazing. He ground his hips against Kael, knowing that this wouldn't last long. He had never been this aroused, which said much since this was something he thought since he and Kael had kissed for the first time. Nothing mattered anymore, not even the events from earlier that day. Everything, all the fear and anger and pain was drowned by this. It was a little like in the dreams, when Kael appeared and led him out of the fire. Only that this, now, was way more intense. And it was real. Magina lost himself in it.

But then he was pushed away. "No." When Magina tried to get closer again, Kael stopped him with a hand on his chest. "Stop. You said you don't want it. And I said I'd leave you alone."

Very slowly he came back to himself. And realized what he had been doing. Magina staggered back and stared at Kael with wide eyes. Where there had been red-hot lust only moments before he felt cold dread. Why couldn't he keep his hands to himself when it came to Kael Sunstrider? Why? Even when he knew who it was, even when he was angry, it always came down to the same result.

Even now, at this moment of clarity, he felt a surge of desire, the known flutter in his stomach, as he looked at the man. Everyone would know what he had been doing if they saw him at this moment. His eyes were glazed over, his mouth slightly open as he panted, his breath too uneven to be normal. His upper body bare and glistening slightly in the sun, his chest rising and falling too quickly. His hair dishevelled and falling over his shoulders and face. He leaned against the truck at his back as if his legs wouldn't support him properly.

Maybe it was because of his good looks that Magina wasn't able to control himself. He was the most beautiful man he had ever seen, after all. But that couldn't be all of it. Finding someone beautiful shouldn't wipe all rational thoughts away like that.

He didn't know what to do, how to react. They had always been in the public and Magina had been able to go away, to leave. This was his ranch, his space, where should he go?

They stared at each other like that for long minutes, neither saying anything while their breathing slowed down. Kael moved first. He took his shirt from the ground and slipped it over his head. Then he took a hair tie and bound the loose blond strands back into a ponytail. He brushed over his shirt once and when he looked up, nothing was left of the after-sex-look. His gaze wandered over Magina, who still stood at the same spot, shirtless and confused.

Kael frowned. Maybe he was just as unsure about what to do as Magina. He didn't appear confused but he was probably just good at hiding it. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to get into your space after you made clear you didn't want it. I wanted to thank you, for not hurting my brothers. And I wanted to tell you that I'll make sure something like that won't happen again."

Deciding he wasn't able to deal with this situation now, Magina left Kael standing where he was and blinked away. Not into the house, but just away. He blinked again and again until he had reached the place at the creak where he cleaned himself and his stuff. He undressed, put everything onto a pile and blinked into the cold water.

He stayed in the water until he was shivering from its cold, until two of his dogs came running and he was reminded that he couldn't think only about himself.

When he was back at the house, Kael was gone. And his shirt and knife as well as his hat lay on the porch. The shirt was neatly folded and the knife and hat lay on top of it. Magina stared at the things for a moment before he left them where they were and went inside to get dressed. With his last set of clothes in the closet.

He sat down on the bed and buried his face in his hands. How could that have happened? Every time he was this close to the Sunstrider it ended like that. It had to stop. If the problem was whenever they were close Magina would make sure they didn't get close like that again. He'd just stay away, no matter what happened. He'd just blink away and leave. He didn't have to talk to Kael and he didn't have to get near him. Even earlier, he could've just left instead of attacking the man. How stupid of him!

But it had been an impulsive act. He hadn't thought about it. Now he promised to himself that it wouldn't happen again. He had to keep a clear head when he faced Kael. And he had to stay away. Out of touching distance. Better yet completely away, not talking and not even looking.

For a moment his treacherous mind went back to Kael visiting. Magina's body shuddered at the memory. He would've liked to say it was from disgust, but who was he kidding? It had felt awesome, wonderful and way too perfect. It had only been them pressing against each other and kissing! And not for the first time! It shouldn't feel like that, not that perfect and wonderful and arousing. It got worse every time they met.

Magina's cat jumped onto the bed and brushed against his back. It purred and tried to crawl on his lap. With a quiet sigh Magina took his hands down and made room for the pet. He stroked over the soft fur and tried to clear his mind. A task easier said than done. His mind really was a treacherous thing as was his body. Both didn't do what he wanted and Magina hated it.

He tried to find some peace in the fact that, if he didn't continue to meet Kael all the time, his memories would fade. Maybe it would take a little longer this time, considering how strong the sensations had been. But they would fade.

What he didn't even realize was that the fear was gone. All thoughts about the past and fire and magic were pushed from his mind. And they didn't return until he dreamt that night, and even then Kael was there and led him away from the nightmares.


	6. Chapter 6

Magina hadn't seen Kael for over a year now. The urge to seek him out, not only when he was in town but all the time, was almost gone. The memories had grown hazy, blurry. For a few weeks, Magina breathed easier, almost relaxed.

Work was hard, as always, but that was fine. It had kept his thoughts occupied for the last year and he was almost grateful for getting too little sleep and working until he was too exhausted to do anything at all. Too exhausted to think.

There was one problem, though, which Magina hadn't seen coming but which slowly showed up: The more he forgot about Kael, the less the man helped him through his bad dreams. They had never stopped, probably never would, but since they had first kissed, Kael had been his anchor in these dreams. He always showed up at one point. He never did anything spectacular, he just took him by the hand and led him away. They walked away from the place where the bad was happening and didn't stop until nothing of it was left.

It was strange how his sub consciousness used the man to get out of a horrible situation, but somehow it did. At first, Magina hadn't realized there would be a problem. The man in his dreams had become more of a ghost, with no real features. But he had still come, always.

One night, he didn't. Magina was trapped in the fire, shouting everywhere around him as the house burned down. He couldn't get out, couldn't get away and for the first time in, he didn't remember, maybe two years?, no one was there to save him.

He woke when the fire was already licking at his feet, the terror about burning alive making Magina rear up on his bed with a shout. He was drenched in sweat and when there was only darkness around him, he was gripped by fear. He blinked to the switch and turned the light on. He was terrified, the dream having been too real, the pictures still in his head. He stared at the room, almost convinced he could see flames, but of course there was nothing. It had been a dream.

Sleeping wasn't an option anymore now but he was used to this. It had been rather normal in the years before he had met Kael. This was something that never faded and where his memories were lacking, his imagination was more than willing to fit the missing pieces in.

Magina started the day in the middle of the night. He did stuff he could do inside of the house, where he had light. Which meant, cleaning. Tidying up. Repairing things inside, like the kitchen cupboard. Or the sink. Sorting through his stored foods and medicines. Mending his clothes and blankets. When the sun rose, Magina was tired but now he had to do all of his other chores.

It had been a long time since he had been this exhausted when he fell into bed that night. But no matter how tired he was, the nightmares came.

He had left the light on because he had suspected it might be like that. Now he sat in bed, rubbing his palms over his face while he tried to get his thoughts into a resemblance of order. He wasn't sure if it had been like that before but he felt as if this was worse than anything he had experienced. Even worse than right after the incident. He had had a few dreams where he hadn't been able to get back to sleep but two nights in a row?

The two nights became three, then four. That day Magina was so tired that he fell asleep in the barn on the hay. That didn't help very much, because he dreamed there, too. When he woke up, he was confused, didn't know where he was, which made it all worse.

Magina finished the work of the day before he searched for some medicine he had gotten right after the incident back then against the nightmares. And the panic attacks. He had kept some of it, just in case. Such a case was now.

It helped him to fall asleep. But it didn't repel the nightmares as is was supposed to do. It made them strangely dulled and sluggish, somehow emotionless, but they were still too real. And they were still nightmares. Waking up after taking the medicine was more difficult, as was getting a clear head. At least there was no panic attack, no fear after he had woken up. It was still dark outside, though, and Magina felt not like himself.

With pants and boots he blinked outside. Normally he didn't do that because he didn't blink to places he couldn't see. He didn't want to crash into one of his dogs or whatever. But his mind was still too slow and he had done it before he could think about not doing it. Magina blinked again and again, moved away from the farm like that.

He had done this before, blinking until he collapsed from the strain of it. It happened when his mind and his body were disconnected somehow and he just couldn't get himself to stop blinking. He should've remembered that this only happened when he had taken the medicine. Not always of course, most times the stuff had actually helped. But sometimes it had been like that. It seemed like the last week everything went wrong. Not with the ranch, but with his body and his mind. It was almost as bad as right after the incident. Magina didn't know why. He had been doing so well!

The moon was almost full this night and shone brightly from a cloudless, starlit sky. His blinking was aimless today. At least that was what it felt like.

Until Magina came almost face to face with two fire elementals. They were familiar, like the two the Sunstrider man in the parking lot had created, just not completely the same. They didn't make any threatening movements, just seemed to watch Magina and so he decided to leave them be. But as he blinked two more times and ended in front of a house, he faltered. What was he doing here?

This was the Sunstrider ranch. And he was in the middle of it. How far had he travelled tonight? He must've gotten stronger because he had never been able to blink so often, or over such a long distance. He didn't feel wiped out yet and the Sunstrider ranch was very far away. Like, almost on the other side of the town. What had he been thinking?

Nothing, he supposed. But what to do now? Just head back home? Somehow, Magina was reluctant. But what did he want here? Was he actually seeking out Kael? With his mind still not completely functioning, he wasn't really sure what he wanted or expected. The only thing he knew was that the house he stood in front of wasn't the only one on the ranch and even if it was, there were at least five Sunstriders here, the parents and three boys. He would never be able to find Kael.

Aside from the fact how absolutely ridiculous it was even to be here. In the middle of the night.

He stood like that for maybe five minutes, maybe more, since he couldn't get his mind to function and judging passing time was very unimportant. Unmoving, staring at the house in front of him, trying to sort his jumbled thoughts.

The door opened and Kael stepped out. He was wearing only pants and no boots. His hair was braided and his features appeared strangely soft in the moonlight. "What do you want here?"

Magina wished he knew the answer to that question. He frowned, unsure what to say.

"Go away."

When he didn't react to that, either, Kael sighed, audibly, and came closer. "What is wrong?"

"Nightmares." That question was easy to answer. "Medicine and nightmares. Can't sleep and can't think."

Kael looked at him, looked him up and down. "And what do you want me to do about anything of that? Or are you here by chance?"

Was he? Here by chance? And what did he want Kael to do? He didn't know.

The man sighed. "Come, I'll bring you home. You'd just hate me more for anything else I could do."

Was that what Magina wanted? Did he hate Kael? If so, why was he here? And why didn't he feel hate at the moment? He didn't move, didn't follow as Kael strode to one of the trucks.

So the man came back and took Magina's hand and it was like the dreams, like in all those dreams where Kael had saved him, had led him away from whatever horror his mind had conjured. He followed willingly, knowing that everything would be all right. As soon as he was seated in the truck, Magina fell asleep, feeling safe.

"Come on, I don't want to carry you inside."

Magina blinked. Where was he? His thoughts were too slow, he couldn't remember what had happened and why he was sitting in a car instead of lying in his bed. Someone tugged at his hand, and seeing who it was, Magina slipped out of the truck and followed. This was probably all a dream anyway. Why would Kael be here otherwise?

In front of the door, they stopped. What was he supposed to do now? Why did Kael let go of his hand?

"Get inside. You are able to get into your bed on your own, aren't you?"

Was he? Magina nodded.

The sun was already high up in the sky as Magina woke with a start. He jumped out of bed and hurried to get dressed. Not time to make breakfast, he just grabbed something from the counter before running outside. He expected to find his animals impatient, hungry and restless.

His dogs came running as soon as they saw him, but they didn't seem to be stressed or anything. They simply greeted him before they took off again. The horses, Magina found, were already outside, with hay and water. The barn had even been cleaned behind them. The chickens had been fed and when Magina went in search for their eggs, he found them neatly stored into a box.

Someone had been here and had done all the work that was due in the morning. That someone was gone by now, but the strange dream from last night came back. Only it hadn't been a dream.

It appeared like that, because his mind had been fogged from the medicine. But he was sure that he had actually gone to the Sunstrider farm and that Kael had brought him back.

Okay, that meant the medicine was off limits for him from now on.

Had the Sunstrider done the stuff on the farm? But why? Magina didn't have time to think about that now. The things that were already done weren't all there was to do and he had to get going. It was late already. At least, he thought as he saddled his horse, he wasn't tired today. He had slept without dreaming anything, just like the medicine was supposed to take effect. There was only this episode in the middle, between the nightmare and the dreamless sleep.

He had to go and thank Kael. No matter how much he hated the Sunstriders, it was the right thing to do. Especially considering that it was probably Kael who had taken care of the ranch this morning.

As Magina drove to the Sunstrider ranch in the late morning he wasn't sure if the flutter in his stomach was from anticipation about seeing Kael, or dread. Though he had never been to the Sunstrider ranch he knew where it was. Of course he did, there weren't so many ranches around the town and the Sunstrider ranch was kind of famous. He supposed his was, too, but for other reasons. Besides, it was always good to know where one's enemies were.

The ranch was all hustle and bustle. A lot of people were running around, doing whatever had to be done. There were a lot of horses and a few dogs raced towards Magina's truck, running alongside him as he approached the ranch.

Before he got out, he closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. He didn't know if it had been a good idea to come here in the middle of the day. Everyone would see him, he just hoped that he wouldn't be recognised. He should've come later, maybe when it was dark or something to avoid meeting people. But he hadn't thought about it, was so accustomed to his ranch and always being alone there that he hadn't thought about it. And now it was too late. It would be suspicious if he turned around and left.

So he got out and tried to find Kael between all the cowboys. There were even children running around. Didn't they have to go to school or something? He didn't know which weekday it was, so he couldn't be sure.

The ranch looked fine, and though so many people ran around, everyone seemed to know what to do. They all moved with purpose. But Kael was nowhere to be seen.

Magina stood next to his truck, unsure what to do next, when a man approached him. He stopped, one thumb in his belt, and pushed his hat a little backwards. "Hello there. How can I help you?"

The man was older, wrinkles around his eyes and his mouth as he smiled at Magina. He didn't look like a Sunstrider, his skin was too dark, as were his hair and eyes.

"I'm looking for Kael Sunstrider. Is he here?"

The man nodded. "He's with the horses. Do you know where that is?"

He didn't, so the man showed him.

"Hey Kael, here's someone for you." The man smiled at Magina before he left with a wave in Kael's direction.

Kael Sunstrider was in a paddock with a horse and looked over at the man's call. When he saw Magina, he put on a completely neutral expression before he came over. Though it was still relatively early in the day, he was covered in dust from head to toes. Whatever he had been doing with the horse, it had included him getting dirty. His clothes were more brown than dark purple and his skin was brown as well. His hair was tied back and his hat shaded his eyes.

"Go away."

Magina frowned. "I just wanted…" He was interrupted by Kael.

"I know what you want to say. It's not necessary. Go away. It's obvious you don't know what you want considering me but I know what I want. And it's definitely not being your hate-love on-off whatever to make you get off. I know you were on some kind of drugs or something the night and it's all right but you should figure out what you want. Leave me be until then, I definitely won't seek you out anymore. Go to your ranch and keep living there all on your own. I'm sure it's amazing." His last words were unmistakably full of sarcasm. Then he turned around and walked away, leaving Magina standing there.

He stared at Kael, how he approached the horse while outright ignoring Magina. He wanted to watch but then he felt magic and, pulling his hat deep into his face, strode to his truck and left. Sunstrider, magic. That was the reason he hated them all.

At least, now that he had seen Kael, the dreams weren't as bad anymore. Maybe it was even better, fuelled by the memory of how the man had actually, for real, helped. Magina was relieved beyond imagination. And then he got angry. How could he be glad about a Sunstrider being the one to get him through is nightmares? But he couldn't change it.

For weeks he debated what to do. Maybe it would be enough to just see Kael once a year to keep him in his dreams. But was that really what he wanted?

Ultimately, he wanted to be free of nightmares and free of everything that was connected to magic. The second would be achievable but the first seemed never to happen.

His thoughts were confusing, and Magina was lost.

When the next marked day came and he drove into town, he went to the rodeo circuit. Two dogs by his side, he got something to eat and drink and watched the competition from farther away. He wouldn't go near but it was fascinating to watch. And he wanted to see Kael. He hated himself for it but he justified going with it easing the nightmares. It was all a mess.

He waited for more than an hour, but Kael didn't compete. Magina watched the people around him, but there was no Sunstrider to be seen. With a heavy sigh, he left the market and the town. What now? What if Kael didn't take part in the rodeo anymore? Where would he see him, then? Would he have to seek him out, once a year, just to be able to function, to keep him in his dreams? It was pathetic.

Not wanting to think about this problem, he pushed it away. There was lots of time. Maybe he'd be there at the next market.


	7. Chapter 7

One day Magina heard the dogs barking as he was in the barn. There was no car or anything, so maybe it was an animal that didn't belong. Or a horse had broken free. Or maybe nothing at all. Since they were there to alert him should something be amiss, Magina wiped his hands on a piece of cloth and left the building.

All five dogs had surrounded a man. They barked, but didn't snarl or growl. The man looked scared by it, nonetheless. He had stopped walking, had stopped moving altogether and tried to keep all five creatures in his field of vision.

The man wasn't someone Magina had ever seen before. Not in town and definitely not on his farm. He was average, average height, average built, average looks. Average of age, too. He was blond with unremarkable features. Nothing hard there but not too soft either.

As Magina approached, the man looked up. He smiled tentatively but clearly relieved that someone was coming for his rescue from the dogs.

"What do you want?" Magina didn't call his dogs back but they stopped barking when he spoke. They had just wanted to alert him and now stood, waiting.

"Hi. Um, I'm looking for work."

Here? "Did someone send you?"

The smile had vanished from the man's face by now, probably due to Magina's not very friendly words and tone. "No. I saw the sign to the ranch and decided to give it a try." He seemed to become nervous. "I can do everything there is to do on a farm. I'm good with animals and I'm hard working."

Magina was unsure about that. He'd had maybe two asks about working on his ranch throughout the years. He hadn't accepted them. Because he hadn't wanted others around. But there was a lot to do. And he could really use some help. He just wasn't sure if he wanted another human being around all the time.

The longer he was silent, the more the man began to fidget. He didn't have much with him, just a small backpack and a water bottle in one hand. He didn't have any weapons, maybe a knife hidden somewhere, but nothing else. No car.

"Did you walk all the way out here?"

The man shrugged with one shoulder. "Sort of." He looked down at his hand clutching the water bottle, then back up. "Please, just let me try for a few days. If it doesn't work, I'll leave."

That was something he could do, Magina thought. A helping hand would be awesome and he could at least try it. If he was bothered by the man, he could send him away again. "What is your name?"

"I, um, my friends used to call me Dragon."

"Dragon?" Nothing about the man would've made Magina call him 'Dragon' but if he preferred this name, he'd use it. "Okay, Dragon. We'll try it. I give you three days, then I'll decide." He looked the man up and down, taking in his worn clothes and dirty boots. The water bottle, only half-full. The small backpack. "You can put your things into an empty room in the house. Then I'll show you around."

The man smiled. "Thank you very much!"

Magina called the dogs away and then watched Dragon head to the house. While he waited for him to return, he crouched and petted his dogs. His thoughts drifted through what he might do when having help on the ranch. He'd never had anyone here, so he wasn't sure how to split the workload. Maybe he'd just have a look at what the man was good at and then decide what to do. He wondered shortly where Dragon came from that he just walked onto some ranch and asked for a job. But then it didn't really matter.

Since there wasn't much to get from Magina regarding money and such, he wasn't afraid that it was a thief. More likely someone without a job and a home in desperate need of a roof over his head and food in his belly. If he was willing to work and they got along, these were two things he could provide. Probably not much more.

"Hey." Dragon walked over and Magina rose. "Isn't anyone else around? Are they all with the cattle?"

"There is no one else. Just me." The man stared, surprised at that. "Come." Magina headed towards the barn, where he had been working before he had been interrupted. Mucking out wasn't something that needed any explanations or briefing other than where to put the muck.

Of course it was faster to get it done by two persons rather than one alone, but it surprised Magina nonetheless. Dragon worked in silence, except for the occasional question about some routine.

Next was the garden but Magina saw relatively fast that gardening wasn't for Dragon. Which wasn't a problem, Magina liked to work with the plants and maybe he could shovel some time free with the man helping with other stuff to be able to spend more time in the garden. He'd have to plant more things anyway, if he needed to feed a second person. He almost smiled as he found himself planning ahead already. That was a good sign. This could actually work out.

Making lunch was all right as well. Dragon said he didn't like to eat meat very much but since Magina mostly had vegetables and potatoes and eggs it was fine. Dragon made himself comfortable with the kitchen and everything in it, also with the content of the fridge. Then he set the table. Magina was glad he still had a second plate and fork.

They ate in silence, washed the dishes in silence. Dragon didn't complain about anything there was to do and helped without having to be prompted to do so.

The afternoon belonged to the cattle. Magina had two horses that could be ridden but only one saddle. He gave it to Dragon and blinked alongside him. Theoretically he could always go to the cattle like that but not long ago he hadn't known how far and how long he was able to blink without feeling drained. After the nightmare and him having gone all the way to the Sunstrider ranch without a problem, he was more confident in maintaining enough energy even with having blinked over such long distances.

And the horses needed to get out once in a while, too. Magina had considered selling them, because if he didn't really need them, what was the sense of keeping them? But he liked riding on horseback and one could never know. He liked the horses as well, and didn't want to part from them. So he had kept them.

There was no time today to check the fences so they headed straight to the cattle. Magina would show Dragon a map with the layout of the land, later.

It took until late in the evening to check on the creatures because Magina hadn't been sure with a few of them and had checked double. He had the feeling something was wrong but couldn't place it. It didn't seem to be urgent, though, so he'd probably get the vet the next day. See if she had time. Dragon didn't say anything until they were on the way back. "I think you are right, that they have something. Not sure what, though." The man stared ahead without saying more.

Back on the farm was the usual stuff to do before Magina prepared dinner. He was extremely hungry because they had been with the cattle for longer than he had expected and then he'd had to prepare everything for the night, first. At least these preparations had gone faster together with Dragon. It was amazing, and the man didn't even know the routine, yet. It was also amazing that Magina didn't feel as disturbed about another person being around him all the time than he had expected to. Astonishing that it didn't make him uncomfortable or anything.

They ate in silence and then headed to their rooms. There were four empty bedrooms in the house, from before. Well, reconstructed from before. Magina didn't use them for anything so it was no problem that Dragon stayed in one of them. He supposed that the people working on the ranch and not being family had stayed in a different building, but there was no other building for that anymore. And it didn't matter.

Dragon looked tired as he scuffled into his room. If he had been on the road, looking for a job, he probably was. And glad to have a bed now.

Magina let him sleep the next morning. He didn't _need_ help and it was only fair to give the men some rest. He could get up early on the following day.

Leaving some of the breakfast for the man, Magina went outside. He was greeted by the dogs and took his time to pet them all. Knowing he had assistance today made him linger with them longer than usual. Then he sent one of the five to fetch the vet and started into the day.

"Why didn't you wake me?"

Magina looked up from where he was cleaning the water tank of the horses. "Good morning." He shrugged. "You seemed tired yesterday and I thought you might need the rest."

"Thank you." With a smile the man took a second brush to help clean the tank. "Your shower doesn't work."

Magina had cut it off when he had wanted to save water. "Right. I usually take a dip in the stream nearby. I'll show you later. I try not to use too much water because I have to cut costs. The same with electricity. Some things don't work in the house because I don't need them."

The gaze sent his way was strange but Magina ignored it. He knew that he wasn't like all the others. But he didn't care and normally there was no one around to witness it. His thoughts drifted to Kael. He had said Magina was strange, but he had said it was refreshing. Like he liked it. He shook the thought off.

The vet arrived around midday. She raised her brows when she saw Dragon but didn't comment on it. The three of them headed out to the cattle, the vet on her quad, Dragon on the horse and Magina blinking alongside them. While she checked the animals, Magina used the time to show Dragon some landmarks in their vicinity. They went to a hill from where they could see better and he explained how far the ranch went, what direction the river came from, where additional water was and where the best places for the cattle were. He showed him some routes he took when wrangling the creatures and such things. They couldn't see all the ranch land from where they were standing and the house was hidden behind some hills, too. But it was a start.

When they headed back down the hill, the vet came towards them. She shook her head. "Nothing wrong, really. They seem to be unsettled by something but they are not ill. No injuries, nothing. Maybe they have been chased by a wolf or something. Or just the weather, it has been too unstable the last week." She stared back at the animals as she spoke. "If they were scared by something, you should check on them more often during the coming days. If it was a wolf, or maybe some people who were too loud, they could come back. But as long as they are not injured or anything you shouldn't worry too much. They are not that delicate." She smiled, of course not at Magina, more at the cattle, before they headed back.

Not worry too much. That was easier said than done. The cattle were Magina's income, his livelihood. If something or someone had spooked them enough for him to pick up on it, it hadn't been nothing. And so he decided to spend the night outside. Dragon stayed on the farm. Magina didn't leave him alone with the chores, this was only the second day, but he felt much better that someone would be here while he wasn't.

It was fine, he realized as he stared up into the night sky. It was cloudy, no stars to be seen and the air was chilly. Having someone to help on the ranch was fine, or maybe having Dragon as help was fine. He didn't know anything about Magina, wasn't from town. He was capable and efficient. He didn't talk much and he always knew what to do. And he didn't complain about the things that were different here than on other farms. Magina had shown him the place by the stream where he washed, had told him he cleaned his clothes there, too. Aside from another strange gaze the man had simply nodded.

The night was quite but Magina was up early nonetheless. He observed the cattle for a while but when he detected no uncommon behaviour, he blinked back to the house. He knocked on Dragon's door before making breakfast.

The man entered the kitchen just in time to set the table, which he did after a friendly 'good morning'. As they sat down, he asked after the cattle.

"Nothing." Magina shook his head. "But I'll stay with them a few more nights, just in case."

They ate in silence for a while. "What about me?" Dragon asked as he leaned back in his chair. "Can I stay?"

It was only the morning of the third day, adding the first half day in. But Magina had had enough time to think about the topic and the man was probably anxious to know if he had to leave or not. He wasn't sure if this here would suit the man, but that was something Dragon had to find out on his own. Magina wouldn't change how he handled the ranch and he wouldn't change the rules he had made for himself. If Dragon was willing to live by them and work just as hard as Magina did, then he was willing to let him stay.

They would have to make a work plan and Magina would have to tell him everything there was to know. "Yes, you can stay if you want to. I don't have much to pay you, we have to figure the details of it out, but at least you'll have a place to stay and enough food. Maybe we can get a few more animals to increase the income of the ranch. I wasn't able to do that alone but between the two of us it should be possible."

"That's all right. At the moment I'm just glad that I don't have to sleep on the side of the road. Thank you."

Magina would've almost asked why he'd had to sleep next to the road. Where he had come from and why he had left. But he wasn't sure he wanted any kind of personal relationship with the man and so he just nodded.

Living together, though, tended to create some form of personal relationship. Especially when also working together. After maybe a week, Dragon began to ask questions. About the ranch and about Magina. Magina made very clear that he didn't want to answer questions about himself but that still left the ranch, over which was enough to answer. Every ranch was different, was handled differently, with different characteristics to keep in mind.

Then Dragon asked if he should give advice on some things, stuff he had learnt differently on the ranch he had worked before. Magina wasn't stupid so he at least listened to the advice. Not everything was good, not in Magina's opinion, but not everything was bad, either.

And after a while Dragon spoke about where he came from, about his home and his family. Magina hadn't asked, but he didn't mind it as much as he had expected he would. He thought he liked the man and just because he didn't want to talk about his past didn't meant he couldn't listen to Dragon's stories. He didn't talk a lot, just sometimes, when they worked side by side and it wasn't too straining. Or when they had finished eating and took a few minutes to relax afterwards. It was nice, to have someone around. Slowly, even though Magina hadn't wanted it, they became something like friends.

* * *

An evening some weeks later, Magina worked in the garden. He had expanded it so there was enough for two of them and he had way more time to tend to it, now. He loved it, did it more as a hobby than as work, had even included some non-edible plants. Just for the fun of it.

Dragon kept him company, though he didn't help working. They had come to the understanding that this wasn't something he should do. Sometimes he fetched water, but Magina was faster with that, so the garden completely erased from Dragon's work-plan. Usually he sat down at the edge with a book and read. Or he talked a bit. Or he just stared at the sky, petting whatever animal joined him.

Today Dragon seemed more sombre than usual. Normally he smiled a lot, was always friendly and relaxed. Easy-going. He had been very quiet throughout the whole day and as he sat down now, he sighed. He was somewhat tense as he stared onto the ground in front of his feet.

Magina kept working but he glanced at Dragon from time to time. He never had to ask for the man to talk but today he didn't say what was bothering him. Magina straightened as he grabbed a water bottle. He stretched a bit, then drank. And decided to go with what felt right. He swiped the sweat from his face with his sleeve before sitting down side by side with Dragon.

"What's the matter?"

Dragon sighed before he smiled sadly. "I miss my friend." He had talked about the ranch he came from but he had never mentioned a friend. His family, yes, but a friend was new.

Magina knew that talking about this, about something that obviously bothered Dragon, would make them closer than before. Until now it had still been a relatively neutral working relationship. But this would change it, though. It was something truly personal and it had too much to do with trust. If they hadn't been friends before, they'd probably be afterwards.

After a second, Magina leaned back against the fence. "Tell me."

"I…" The man swallowed. It wasn't easy for him to say what would come next. "I betrayed her. That's why I left the farm of my family."

There was a long pause, but Magina just waited. There had to be more but he didn't want to pry. If it was difficult for the man to talk about, he'd just wait. And drink his water. They weren't in a hurry, the last days had been good. They could take a few moments and just sit around. Dragon could take his time before he was ready to answer.

"Today is her birthday. We've celebrated her birthday together since we were kids. Now I'm not sure there is anyone to congratulate her at all, not to mention celebrate. I miss her but she doesn't want to see me anymore. She hates me and rightly so. I never wanted to hurt her but I did and I can't change the past. I regret it, everything, all the time. But that isn't enough." His voice cracked and he took a deep breath. "I don't know where she is, anyway. She left a long time ago."

Magina whished he hadn't asked. Now he was confronted with this story and didn't know what to say or do. Should he hug Dragon? He eyed him but the man seemed to be not in a state where he needed hugging. Then what should he say? Should he say that he felt sorry for him? Or that everything would be all right? He didn't know and it made him extremely uncomfortable. He couldn't give him any advice, either. So he remained silent.

That seemed to be enough, though. About a minute later, Dragon smiled at him. It wasn't the sad smile from before, not really happy either, but something in-between. "I hope she's happy. Or will be happy again one day."

Three of the dogs came running, having spotted them sitting on the ground. They were all over Dragon, having soon found out that he was far more open to petting than Magina was. Not that he had ever neglected his pets, but Dragon was different. He cuddled with them and played, talking to them and such. They all loved him.

As he stood up, Magina smiled at the pile of man and dogs. "I'm sure she'll be happy again one day."

"Thank you." The sadness was still there, but not as much as before and though it had made him uncomfortable, Magina was glad he had talked with Dragon.

He kept working in the garden for a while longer. His thought slipped to Kael. He hadn't thought about him this day but the conversation now… Was Kael happy?

But then, what did he care?

They were no friends, they were nothing. But the last time he had seen the Sunstrider, he had appeared to be somewhat worn-out. Tired or something. He had been working with a horse and had been covered in dust. No way to really tell. Besides, it didn't _matter_.

But then he wondered: had he hurt Kael? He had always only thought about his own pain, about how betrayed he had felt, how he had been torn between hatred and lust. He was still torn between the two but enough time had passed since their last meeting. A meeting during which nothing had happened.

Somehow Magina had come to terms with the fact that it was a Sunstrider who saved him nightmare after nightmare. He couldn't change it anyway, so he had tried to get used to it. Now he felt calmer when thinking about Kael and he was actually able to see his point of view. Maybe it was because he wasn't as stressed as before because of dealing with a whole farm on his own. Maybe it was because working in the garden actually relaxed him, made his mind clear. Or it was because of the way Dragon talked to him, about himself and his family. And just now, about a friend he had lost. Whatever the cause, Magina was able to think about the Sunstrider without being instantly consumed by hate.

It must've taken lots of courage on Kael's part to approach Magina and ask him out. It must've been highly embarrassing, the way their second encounter had gone. And ended. He had been angry when Magina hadn't called. He had been even angrier when Magina had left him standing without explaining why he ran away. And then he had been attacked by Magina, still without any explanation. It must've taken courage to come to his farm and try to talk to him, only to be rebuked. For something he hadn't had a part in. Magina knew all that, but just the thought of magic, of someone who was able to wield magic, it made him sick in the stomach. When he thought about their kisses and stuff, he was flooded by so many conflicting emotions that his whole body hurt.

It was too late now anyway. What had happened and what they had done, he couldn't change it. There was no use thinking about it.


	8. Chapter 8

Something was wrong with the cattle again. Magina and Dragon looked at each other. They had become close friends over the weeks and though they had split some of the workload there was still much they did together. Like looking after the cattle.

Magina had bought a second saddle so they could both ride.

They shortly discussed the course of action. Dragon would stay with the animals, see if he could find anything specific instead of just having a feeling that something was wrong. Meanwhile Magina would get back to the ranch. He'd do the remaining work before nightfall and come back with dinner for both of them. They'd stay together with the cattle, including two dogs.

The first night like that nothing happened. Dragon stayed with the cattle throughout the day, Magina joined him for the night. It was well past midnight, when he heard something.

Not very loud, just something that didn't belong. He tried to locate the sound. He didn't move, not even opened his eyes, as he tried to find out what was out there. A brush against his hand told him Dragon was awake, too. He had touched him briefly, low-key, to tell him he was alert as well. Or maybe to wake him up.

To be able to see something, Magina turned onto his stomach slowly. It was dark but he thought he saw a light flickering in the distance. Where there should be no light. "Dragon", he whispered.

"Saw it." The man was on his stomach next to him and together they stared out into the darkness. Magina told his dogs to stay and they didn't move.

Another flicker of light, this time closer. Magina estimated it to be near the fence to his ranch, though it was hard to tell in the darkness. He got up. Whoever it was, the creature had no right to be here.

He felt more than he saw that Dragon stood by his side as he crept towards the fence and the spot the light had been. It was too silent around them, which made Magina uneasy. Why was there someone or something sneaking around his ranch?

The smell of magic tainted the air. It had to be strong magic for Magina to smell it all the way from the fence. He was ready to act. Nothing happened, except that the smell of magic got stronger. And Magina's unease grew. He tried to concentrate, to not let the smell trigger a panic attack. This was important, this was his ranch, his cattle. He had to stay alert.

A fire blazed up, down by the fence, vaguely illuminating a creature that was wolf-like, but way bigger with blue fog moving over its body that blurred the outlines and features of the beast. Magina blinked forward, ready to attack and defend his cattle. Before he could reach the creature though, something flared past him. Something bright, lighting the night. He turned, confused.

It had been Dragon. The light as well as the smell of magic! He hovered over the ground, a perfect pair of wings sprouting from his back and keeping him floating in the air. And in his hands he held spheres of light. One of the spheres he hurled at the creature by the fence.

It was a shock for Magina. He had never suspected Dragon to be a mage and the man had never indicated anything. And why did he have wings? He stared at him with wide eyes, frozen to the place, unable to move, his mind having shut off at what he was seeing.

A sound behind him made him turn back to the fence and the fire the thing down there had evoked. Only there was no fire. There were two of the creatures, clearly visible now that the light from Dragon had hit them. They moved around rather panicked and the fire was gone. They didn't seem to be hurt much by the light, more disturbed than anything else. They looked at Magina and Dragon. Then they bolted. The light faded and they disappeared into the darkness of the night.

The light in Dragon's hands went out, too, so Magina couldn't see the man anymore. He stared at the spot where he knew Dragon was hovering. A rustle of feathers, then a sigh. "I hope that taught them a lesson. They were probably out to hunt some of the cattle. I wonder what they wanted to do with the fire, though. Maybe they use magic to kill. Didn't we realize that one of the cows was missing or was this their first hunt?"

Magina wanted to answer, but he was at a loss for words. His mind reeled. Mage, it shouted. Then, friend.

"How easy." Dragon laughed softly. "Want to check on the cattle, just in case? Or wait till it's morning?"

Such a normal question within the turmoil of thoughts. He couldn't focus on it. What had they been doing? Why were they here? Why was Dragon a mage?

"Magina?" When he felt a touch on the shoulder, Magina flinched. "Are you all right? Did they do something? Did they hit you with something before I could silence them?" Silenced them, made them unable to cast magic. That was why the fire at the fence had vanished. When he still didn't answer, Dragon grabbed his arm and shook him lightly. "What is wrong with you?"

"You are a mage."

"Wow, yes, I am. So?" Dragon released him and then he conjured one of the spheres back onto his palm, to create some light. It flickered and smelled like magic and Magina took a step back. Dragon frowned. "You don't like magic?" He shrugged and the sphere disappeared. "No problem, I almost never use magic anyway. It's only for defence and I don't need to defend myself that often." There was a smile in his voice. "Even less since I'm here, on your ranch. It's nice."

It was too much. "I need some time." Magina blinked away. He wasn't worried about the cattle anymore, even less with Dragon being with them. Which was a strange feeling, considering the man was a mage. How could Magina feel better knowing that he was protecting his source of livelihood?

He didn't sleep anymore that night. He thought about Dragon. About magic and his ranch. About himself and his past. He was overdramatic and unfair in his judgment of Dragon, he knew that because he knew the man. He knew that he was always friendly and hard-working and always tried to do his best. He was a good friend. A good person. Just because he could wield magic didn't mean he was automatically bad. Especially since he had never used magic before. Only now, to defend the ranch, a ranch that wasn't his. And Magina. He had used the magic to help.

It hadn't even been to hurt. At least not much, from the look of it. Dragon had barely hit them with magic, had basically only silenced the two intruders so they couldn't use their magic, had simply made them realize that there was someone defending the cattle they had wanted to hunt. It hadn't been violent, simply a show of force or something.

Magina was shaken nonetheless. The experiences he had made with magic were deeply rooted together with panic, fear, and loss. The smell of magic tightly connected with fire and death. He couldn't hate Dragon for being a mage. But he didn't know what to feel instead.

Then his thoughts drifted towards Kael. He had only used his magic in defence, either. And he hadn't hurt Magina with it. But he was a Sunstrider, that was something different. Or wasn't it?

Why had he ever let someone help him on the ranch? Why had he ever let someone buy him a drink in town? He had always known that to talk with people meant to give them the means to hurt you. And Magina hurt. His head hurt but also his heart.

He didn't know what to do, what to think. Because if he didn't accept Dragon's magic, he'd lose a friend. His only friend. But if he accepted that Dragon was a mage and that he could live with it because he had never used the magic for anything bad, then what was with Kael? Wouldn't he have to give Kael a chance to prove himself, too? And what was with all the pain Magina had already felt because he had pushed Kael away? Had it been for nothing? Because he was too close-minded and stubborn to think about everything rationally?

But what about the incident, the fire, the Sunstriders' part in it? Should he just forget about it?

Yes, he could differentiate between a Sunstrider and a mage from somewhere else. But then, what about the fact that Kael had been a child when the fire had happened? Could he really hold him responsible for something he hadn't done? Until now it had been bad enough that he was a mage and a Sunstrider, but when he erased the mage-part as problem, only the Sunstrider-part remained. And it counted too little.

What had he done?

The sun rose slowly over the planes but Magina was too tired to get up. He was exhausted from this inner conflict. And he still didn't know what to do.

The sound of footsteps drew near but he didn't want to move. He knew that it was Dragon but he couldn't look at him.

"I brought you breakfast." Dragon put something down beside Magina. He hesitated. Then he walked around Magina and sat at his head. "Do you want to talk about it?"

No, he definitely didn't. He wouldn't even know what to talk about, really. His thoughts jumped from one thing to the other too fast for him to grasp one and ponder on it. He'd never be able to put it into words.

It was silent for a long time.

"You know," Dragon began, "we are all mages in the family. Not everyone is related, but we all have the same kind of magic. Our ranch belongs to the ones that are relatives and it always goes to the next eldest child. Like, similar to a crown in a monarchy. So, this girl, she is the next in line. And she is perfect. Intelligent, strong, confident, determined. I loved her from the first time I saw her and I never parted from her more than a day. But of course, just like in a monarchy, there is always someone who wants the crown. Someone who wants the place of the eldest child.

I was part of the defenders of the farm. We learn to use magic to be able to fight should the need arise. In our part of the country, it isn't that uncommon. Raids or something are normal. The defenders, they listen to the ranch owner, directly, and so we are often sent on some mission or such.

The times I spent apart from the love of my live grew in number. I hated it but I couldn't change it. Only too late did I realize how it had all been planned. They wanted me away because they wanted her gone. If I had seen it coming, I might've been able to stop them. As it was, I was too blinded by my obedience and by my belief that they wouldn't be so cruel. That this family was a good one and that they'd never try to get rid of someone just because they were about to inherit the ranch. I was wrong. Just because most members of a family are good doesn't mean that there can't be one or two who aren't.

I suppose that goes the same with races or stuff like that. You can't say all ranchers are good or all mages are good. There are always some who'll show you how wrong you were. I also suppose it goes the other way round, too.

In my case, it cost me my love. I was so convinced that the whole family was like the one girl I loved that I didn't see the ones who weren't. One can't generalize people like that. Not in one way and not in the other. Not when knowing many and for a long time and even less when that isn't the case."

Dragon shifted. When he spoke again, Magina realized he had stood up. "I don't think you should do it, generalize. Or assume something of someone. I know how tempting it is. I want to label the whole family as bad after what has happened. But that would be just as wrong as labelling them all as good has been before. Everyone is a person on their own. I can say whom I don't like and I can say who did wrong, maybe even who is bad and who isn't. But I can't call them all the same just because they are from one family."

"Are you talking about the Sunstriders?" The words had been out of his mouth before Magina could think.

"What? I don't know any Sunstriders. I was thinking about your obvious dislike of mages. Whatever you have heard, we are all different. I just want you not to judge me by the fact that I can do magic."

"I know that mages are not all the same and that they are not all bad!" Magina was frustrated. Not about Dragon, but about himself. "The rational part of me knows it but it all feels so wrong! What has happened, it is too violent to just forget it and it is completely interwoven with magic. I try to differentiate, but it's not that easy."

"I know it isn't easy sometimes. Take all the time you need. If you want me to leave, just say so." Now he sounded sad, though still understanding. Magina didn't want him to be sad and he didn't want him to leave. He just hated magic.

"I'll figure it out." He opened his eyes and focused on Dragon. "You don't have to leave."

With a smile, he nodded. "Eat your breakfast. Though it'll be cold by now." Then he left.

Food was a good idea. No one could think properly with an empty stomach. That done, Magina lay back down. He was sure that Dragon would take care of the ranch for the time being. And so he took the liberty of having help and of being able to take a few hours without doing anything. Except thinking.

Of course Dragon was right with what he had said about generalizing all mages. But his story was too suitable for the Sunstriders. The problem wasn't really Dragon being a mage. Not at this point in their friendship anyway. It was that by befriending one mage, Magina couldn't keep pushing Kael away. But then it had all been for nothing. The suffering, not only his, but Kael's.

He'd be responsible for it. Until now he had always justified behaving like he did towards Kael with the man being a mage. When this point ceased to matter, all that remained would be Magina behaving like an arse.

Why did Dragon have to be a mage? Why did Kael have to be one? And a Sunstrider on top of it. At this moment, Magina hated his life. The first person he felt attracted to and the first friend he had… This was just not fair.

There was no solution. Magina trudged back to the house without knowing what to do. But there was work and he couldn't sit around all day and wallow in self-pity.

Dragon eyed him wearily but he didn't ask any questions. Magina didn't want to talk and so they worked silently side by side. On one side this helped, seeing that nothing had changed. That Dragon was the same, no matter if he used magic or not. On the other side it made Magina so aware of how badly he had treated Kael that he felt sick. Because the man was the same, too.

He had lots of time to think about everything the following days. There wasn't over much to do, just the usual stuff, and it was easily doable together. Lots of time to think about what it all meant, how he stood towards magic, what he should do.

It wasn't that hard to decide anything concerning Dragon. The man was his friend, just because he was able to cast magic didn't mean he should forget everything else. He was still a valuable part in Magina's days. To push him away because of something like that would simply be wrong.

"Do you want me to show you?" Dragon sat by the garden where Magina was working.

"What?" The question had been completely out of the blue and he didn't know what Dragon wanted.

The man closed his book and looked at Magina. "You are tense all the time, like you are uncomfortable to be around me. Maybe if I show you what I can do, how my magic works, maybe it will help?"

This description was spot on. Magina _was_ uncomfortable. He wasn't so sure if seeing the magic again would make it any better. But on the other side, being like this would drive him crazy. Maybe he needed to be confronted with it full on. Could be it triggered a panic attack but there was worse than that. He guessed it was worth a try and so he straightened, pulled his gloves off and nodded. "Okay."

Dragon's eyes widened in surprise. He had clearly not expected this answer. Then he smiled, put the book on the ground and stood. "My spells are all based on light", he began. "I can hurt others with the light in form of a sphere, though it isn't that painful. But, and that is way more important, I can make others unable to use magic, silence them, for a short time. I…" he looked around, didn't find what he was searching for. His eyes landed on Magina. "I have to show you. But," He grimaced. "If it's okay, I can show it on you. Silence you, I mean, not hurt you with the light."

"I don't think it'll have any effect, I am not a magic user."

"Hm, right. But you can do this blinking, I'm sure silencing you would prevent that, too, even though it isn't a magical ability."

To have Dragon use magic on him? Magina swallowed nervously. But the man had said it didn't hurt. And only lasted a short time. What could possibly go wrong? He didn't like it but he wanted to see this through, wanted to see what Dragon could do.

The spell wasn't painful the least. Actually, Magina felt no difference at all.

But Dragon nodded. "Try to blink."

He tried. Nothing. There was no reason not to, but when he wanted to blink forward, nothing happened. With wide eyes, he stared at Dragon. "Wow. That's… how long does it last?"

"Not long. A minute at most."

"That's not long?" A minute, especially if he was fighting or something, was awfully long. "Okay, show me the other things." So far it was all right. He didn't feel any panic and it didn't even smell like magic. Not being able to blink wasn't a problem, it wasn't as if he relied on that ability, anyway. Sometimes it was useful but without it Magina was just as fine.

"Um, okay." He hesitated. "I can do some spells that are directed at creatures and some that aren't. The directed ones are like what you've seen the night, just a ball of light that hurts by impact. I can vary it, the amount of pain it inflicts. When I concentrate the light, the energy, I can create a hemisphere on the ground, big enough to cover several creatures who stand close to each other. Within this hemisphere, light rains down and it really hurts. One can leave the hemisphere because it is stationary…"

"Stop stalling," Magina interrupted Dragon. "You offered to show me." He tried to blink, only a few feet, and was relieved that he was able to do that again. Strange, he hadn't felt any difference between now and moments ago.

Now he could smell magic. The air was heavy with it and Magina tried to block it out. No need to panic, here. When the hemisphere appeared, he jerked. It was pure magic, everything about it. But, it was beautiful. All light and bright it didn't appear as if standing inside would hurt. The hemisphere was bigger than he had expected and the raining light even made noise similar to rain. It dropped out of the frame and disappeared on the ground. And though the feeling of magic was strong, Magina wasn't afraid. This was completely different from anything he had seen before.

Intrigued by it, as well as by his absence of panic, he walked closer.

"You shouldn't touch it." Dragon was by his side and his warning was probably justified. It was his magic, after all. However, Magina ignored him and reached out with his hand. At first he felt nothing as his fingers breached the frame of the hemisphere. Then it was like rain, just not wet. Then it hurt. The pain wasn't too great and so he reached in further, until his whole arm was engulfed by light. And because it didn't hurt as much as he had thought while it looked amazing, Magina stepped inside. The light was all around him, so bright it hurt in his eyes. It hit his skin like rain drops but vanished without leaving a trace. The points where it struck hurt, deep into the flesh of his body, not only on the surface. Maybe the light disappeared into his body.

The hemisphere faded away and with it the pain and the smell of magic.

"Are you okay?" Dragon sounded extremely concerned and he was pale. He rushed closer and touched his fingers against Magina's face. "Are you hurt? You cannot just walk into the flare!"

But Magina was fine. He smiled and batted the hand away. "That was an amazing display of magic. It was beautiful!"

"Thank you, but normally no one keeps standing in it voluntarily. Didn't it hurt?"

"A little. It wasn't so bad."

The look he received was full of pure disbelieve. "Okay, since I'm sure nothing is wrong with my magic, I assume something is wrong with you." Then he laughed. "Well, so much the better. How do you feel?"

"Considering you and your magic? Better." Way better. It wasn't the same, it was nothing like the fire and the death. Of course this was designed to hurt, too, but aside from the fact that Dragon had only used it once in a case of defence, it didn't have this air of being uncontrollable. Unlike a fire, which, once set, couldn't be contained anymore. One couldn't escape the fire but one could easily step out of the flare of light. The silencing was creepy but it wasn't really something he needed to be afraid of. And the light balls he could throw? Didn't seem so bad, either. "Anything else you can do?"

"Just conjuring my wings and fly." Huge wings spread from his back, white, grey and light brown feathers shifting with the movement.

"Practical." The summoning of the wings didn't feel like magic at all. They didn't look unnatural, maybe that was the reason why. They belonged to Dragon as a part of his body and he just hid them.

It was astonishing but having Dragon show him his magic had actually helped. Magina felt better, not as on edge. He knew what the man could do, now, and he wasn't afraid of any of it.

It all left one question, though: what about Kael and his magic? He hadn't created any form of fire and he had used his magic only to defend himself.

As much as Magina hated to admit it: he had been wrong. Wrong in treating Kael the way he had and wrong in pushing him away. Now, how to fix that?

And fixing it was a must.


	9. Chapter 9

The following days were spent trying to gather enough courage to go and see Kael and apologize. There was no guarantee that everything was fine now, but Magina had been forced to get a new view on magic. He still hated the Sunstriders for what they had done. He still felt slightly nauseous at the thought of talking with one willingly. But Dragon was right. He couldn't lump them all together and see them all as the same.

So he wanted to at least try and see what happened. Talking with Kael was the first step.

He had never been as nervous as when he drove onto the Sunstrider ranch. He was greeted by two dogs and a man, who came over as Magina climbed out of the truck.

"Hey, what'r you looking for?"

"Hello. Is Kael here?" Magina was still gripping the door tightly with one hand.

The man eyed him up. "No."

His courage was slowly leaving him. "Um, when will he be back?" He didn't know if he'd be brave enough to come here again.

"Who are you?"

That was a tricky question. "An acquaintance." Not a lie.

"He won't come back. Left about a year ago, said he had enough of the ranch life. Hasn't visited once since then." The man shrugged as if he couldn't care less. "His father isn't happy bout it, though he always said the boy was thinking too much and him being gay didn't really help their relationship. But he is the only one who can deal with the horses. I suppose you can reach him on his phone." The man nodded goodbye and left.

Magina was shocked. Kael was gone. He stood at least a minute next to his truck, his mind not really able to process what he had just heard.

Then he drove into town and bought a phone. He didn't want to think about what he was doing, afraid he'd see how stupid he behaved. Why should he call Kael? There was no reason. The man had left so it was over anyway. He was obviously through with this part of his life.

"Dragon!" Magina called as soon as his feet hit the ground on the ranch. "Dragon, can you show me how a phone works?"

The man raised his brows but didn't say anything. He didn't ask about Kael, though Magina had briefly summed up whom he had been going to see. Nothing too personal and nothing specific. "We need electricity in at least one plug socket. The phone has to be charged before we can do anything."

That was the easy part. And while the phone charged, Magina went into his room. He knew that he had kept Kael's note with the phone number. He hadn't wanted to throw it away at first because Kael had given it to him. And later he hadn't thought about it anymore.

So now he rummaged through one of his drawers. And was successful. He stared at the number and the name written on the small piece of paper. But before he could change his mind, he went back into the kitchen, to Dragon.

While he had been gone, Dragon had switched the phone on. He held it out for Magina, who grabbed it immediately. "I want to make a call."

Still easy. But then it rang for the first time. Magina stared at Dragon and suddenly he was afraid. He was terrified. What should he say? What was he doing? He almost hung up, but Dragon shook his head. Then he smiled and gave Magina a thumbs-up before he left the room. "It will be fine."

Magina was alone in the kitchen and the phone rang again. Was it the fifth time? How long should he let it ring?

"Yes?"

Magina froze. His heart was suddenly in his throat and as he opened his mouth to say something no words would come out.

"Hello? Who is there?"

What now?

"Hello?" A sigh on the other end of the line and Magina was sure Kael would hang up now.

"I'm sorry!" He blurted it out, desperate but not knowing how to act.

There was silence and for a moment Magina thought he had been too late. He looked at his phone but the connection appeared to be still standing. "I'm sorry. For everything."

"Magina? Leave me alone."

"Wait! Please, can't we meet? I… I even bought a phone to be able to reach you."

"That's touching. But no, I don't want to meet. I'm out with my boyfriend, so I don't want to talk to you, either." Kael's voice was emotionless and distant.

"Okay." It hurt to hear that but what had he expected? "I just wanted to tell you that I know I did wrong in treating you the way I did. And that I am truly sorry for everything. I didn't want to hurt you, I swear, I simply never took the time to really think about your point of view. I…" he took a deep breath before he continued. "I wish you are happy wherever you are. I had hoped I could apologize face to face but I don't want to make your life harder again. I wish you the best. Take care." At the last words, his voice broke. And so he disconnected the call before he would do something stupid like cry and sob into the phone.

He leaned against the kitchen counter and closed his eyes. He didn't know if that had gone well or not. At least he had been able to apologize, though he had wanted to say much more, to explain why he had behaved the way he had. He had hoped to get a different reaction from Kael but he couldn't be mad at the man. Him not wanting to talk to Magina was justified. And him having a boyfriend was, too.

Dragon was overly nice the remaining day. It was more than clear that the phone call had not gone the way Magina had wished. And Dragon was very considerate. Even without knowing any details.

Magina tried to push it away the following day. Being sad all the time wasn't good for getting work done. At least Kael was still in his dreams. Though he was fading and Magina wondered how long he'd stay there. And what should he do once the remaining memory of the Sunstrider was gone? Kael wasn't here anymore, he couldn't simply go into town on marked day and watch him do some rodeo. But being afraid of what might happen wasn't good for getting work done, either. And he couldn't change anything about that problem, anyway.

He had apologized, had tried to make things right. There was nothing more he could do. He'd debated calling a second time but that would be plain disregarding Kael's wish. It wouldn't bring him any bonus points. He'd thought about writing a text where he explained everything, right down to the smallest details. But that would be just the same. He had to see this thing with Kael, whatever it had been, as finished.

Slowly, the sadness faded. At least for the most part. The days were good and the nights weren't too bad, either. The weather was awesome, the cattle was doing great and with Dragon by his side it was actually fun to work on the ranch.

One morning, while they were both working in the barn, Magina heard a truck drive onto the yard. His hands were entirely covered in dirt and so he asked Dragon to go see who it was.

When he heard steps, he assumed it was Dragon and didn't look up as he asked: "Who was it?"

"I heard you are ready to apologize to me."

For sure, Magina's heart stopped. He whirled around and froze. There was Kael, leaning casually against the wall, thumbs hooked into his belt and a smile on his lips. The smile grew wider as Magina only stared, dirty and sweaty, eyes wide and heartbeat suddenly racing. He was overwhelmed by conflicting emotions and the only safe thing was to do absolutely nothing.

Dragon peeked around a corner. "I'm out, checking the cattle. If you need me, just call. Bye!" He waved and left.

"So, you have a mage working for you, then." Kael seemed to be amused about Magina's behaviour. At least he found it more funny than annoying. He even laughed when Magina still didn't react. "Come, let's talk inside. Maybe you can make some tee?" He raised his brows, as if asking 'are you able to do that or do you want to keep standing there like an idiot for the rest of the time'.

Magina rushed forward. This was a simply task, that he could do.

He was nervous, though. He almost dropped the cup and then he spilled hot water over his hand. The burning pain helped him to get some focus, though. "So, um, what exactly do you want from me?" He didn't dare look at Kael, fearing his nervousness would return full force.

"I want that you explain everything. Maybe start with why this change of mind has occurred." He leaned back in the chair, seeming relaxed.

With the tea pot and two cups, Magina sat down as well, and stared at his hands lying on the table. He sighed. This was what he had wanted, the opportunity to explain everything and to apologize face to face. But it wasn't easy. "It was Dragon, the man who's working with me." He peered at Kael without raising his head.

The man nodded. "The mage I met."

"Yes. Well, when he arrived here, I didn't know he was a mage. But we became friends. Good friends. When I found out that he was able to do magic, I was devastated. I felt truly lost. But he said a few things, about prejudices. He told me about his family and how assuming things about people just because they belong to a family or because they are able to do certain things, like magic, can be fatal. It was the other way round, for him. He didn't assume something bad but rather something good." Magina shook his head slightly. "Not important." He took a deep breath. "Anyway, he was right. But I was aware that him being right meant that I had behaved like a complete arse towards you. Not just the prejudice thing, but everything else, too. If I had just told you that I don't want to interact with you it would've still been stupid. But at least it wouldn't have been nasty or mean. The way I behaved, attacking you, and then all this hot-and-cold and on-and-off and stop-and-go, it was unnecessary and not right. I apologize for that, for the way I treated you. I'm really sorry." Magina was almost afraid to look up. Had this been all-right? Had it been enough? Had he done it right? He wasn't sure, wasn't sure he had been able to get across what he wanted to say.

"Okay, so you befriended a mage and he set your head straight." Kael sounded astonishingly neutral, not showing what he thought about Magina's apology. "I have another question though: What happened when you were young, what is the cause of you hating my family? Or hating mages, in general."

And there it was. Now he had to talk about it. He had never spoken to anyone about it and simply the thought of it made panic rise. But if he wanted Kael to forgive him, he had to tell him everything. He concentrated on breathing for a few moments. Breathe in, breathe out. Focus. Then he began.

"It was night. I slept together in a room with two others. One of them heard something and woke us because he was alarmed. I was very young and so the two told me to hide in a closet. I did that while they left the room to investigate. It was completely dark in the closet and I didn't dare open a door. Something wasn't right and I knew it. I thought it was in the air, a smell I didn't recognize. Now I know that it was magic. It was all over the ranch, everywhere." He stopped and took a sip of tee. Kael had poured it after Magina had begun to talk. His hand shook a little but otherwise he was still fine.

"Then the shouting began. I couldn't understand the words but it sounded as if it was bad. I was too afraid to leave my hiding place so I didn't see anything. But the sounds were bad enough. There was screaming and crying and then it got hotter around me. Unnaturally hot. And I knew I had to get out of this closet and out of the house and away from everything. And I couldn't leave through the door because whatever was wrong, it was there. And then, in my panic, I blinked for the first time. I had read about this ability, how one had to focus all thoughts and all willpower. How it was an act of control. It was no control but there was enough willpower I guess, to even the missing focus out."

He drank again. This hadn't been the worst part of the night. It had merely been the beginning. The shaking intensified and he had to consciously breathe again. Slow and even.

A hand closed over his. "I'm sorry that this is so hard for you. But I have to know it. If you want to take a break, though, it's fine."

Magina looked up then. Kael was leaning over the table, worry lining his features. He had the hair tugged behind an ear on one side while it fell forward and almost into his eyes on the other side of his face. He looked so beautiful, it made Magina's heart hurt with longing.

"No, I can keep going." But looking at his hands was still easier. Kael's hand on top of his was strangely soothing. "It was night but because of the fire there was enough light. The main house was burning, as were one barn, the shed and the house for the workers. People were everywhere and they were trying to extinguish the flames. But it was no use. The fire was magical, it was alive, and tiny flames jumped around, over the ground, searching for new things to burn. No one of us was able to use magic and non-magical means were useless. And then the fire decided, since there were no houses to burn anymore, that it would take anything else it would get. The animals that were around and of course the people." Magina closed his eyes but that only made it worse. He could see it all again, hear it, the shrieks, the fire, the magic all around him. A hand squeezed his and he focussed on that feeling.

"It was horrible and I could do nothing. I couldn't help but I couldn't leave my friends and family either. So I sat there, far enough away from the fire to remain unhurt. Everything burned down, until there was only ash remaining. Help came too late, way too late. I was in shock by then, still hadn't moved and they had to carry me away. I heard how someone confirmed that it had been magic. And then the rumours started. I couldn't tell them anything, I didn't know anything. But it had been no accident. A mage had started the fire and had fuelled it, a strong mage."

Now he looked up, eyes locking with Kael's. "There had been a fight earlier that day on the ranch. The Sunstrider's had wanted something and we hadn't wanted to give it. I don't know what it had been about but there had been a lot of shouting until the Sunstrider left, very angry. He is a strong mage and he is good with fire. And after it all, he got some of the land as well as cattle. They said, it was as compensation because he helped to build the new house and the barn. But it fits too well. And I don't believe it. I didn't believe anyone because they were all telling me different things, strange things and lots of empty words. Many people wanted stuff from me, like payment for their help. It was all too dubious and so I stayed alone. But that, that's the reason I hate all mages. What they are able to do is unnatural and dangerous. They have all this power and it leaves others helpless. And I hate the Sunstrider's most of all, because they stole my land, my cattle, and all after they sat everything on fire. They burned my family, my friends, my pets! They left nothing."

Magina realized what he was saying. Again. "I… Sorry, I don't…" He sighed. He couldn't say he didn't hate them, because it would be a lie. But: "I don't hate you. I…"

"It's all right." Kael sounded calm, not bothered the least. Then he stood up. "I need to go. I thank you for telling me everything. I know it wasn't easy and I appreciate it. The number from which you called me, is it yours?"

There were a lot of jumps in Kael's thoughts and Magina tried to keep up. "I, um, yes, I have a phone now."

"Okay." He nodded. "I'll text you." With that he was gone, leaving Magina sitting alone at the table in the kitchen. Kael hadn't drunk any tea, so his cup stood there, still full.

Magina was confused. He was emotionally drained from speaking about what had happened to him and Kael's reaction was strange. He couldn't read anything from it. Was it good? Was it bad? Why had he left immediately? Had he done something wrong?

He felt as if he was in a dream, it all seemed unreal somehow. He went outside and into the garden. He wasn't sure what he had to do on the ranch, he couldn't concentrate on what had to be done and what was already done. So he worked with the plants because it calmed him.

"Heyo." Dragon sat down in his usual spot by the garden. "The cattle is fine, but we should keep an eye on the fence in the northern section. It looks a little crooked. Did you do anything beside the garden?"

Magina sat down next to him, swiping his dirty hands on his pants. "No. I didn't know what you had already done and I couldn't concentrate enough to go through everything."

"How was the talk? Kael said you might need company."

"I'm not sure. He left directly afterwards without saying much. But I think I feel better now that I have explained everything. He fetched you?" Magina leaned against the wall at their backs and looked over the ranch. The dogs came running, having spotted them sitting on the ground and recognizing their chance at being petted. "Thank you for helping me on the ranch. And thank you for taking care of everything when I am like this." Magina had never said it, but he was very grateful that Dragon was there.

"You are very welcome."


	10. Chapter 10

That night, the nightmare was different. Well, at least the ending was. Kael was there, but he didn't lead Magina away. Instead, he looked at him and then left. Magina woke up with a start.

Of course the entire nightmare had been more real than usual, because he had talked about the events from then. He had expected it and had left the light in his room on.

Not sure what to do now, he grabbed his phone. Dragon had explained how the texting worked with it (he had asked after Kael had said he'd text) but when he had gone to bed, there had been no message from the Sunstrider. Now there was.

Magina blinked at the screen. But there it was. A message. He opened it. 'Hey. Come over to the Sunstrider ranch tomorrow, in the morning.' The second text was 'Please. Kael.' As if he had remembered to be polite. Though it was a strange message with a hint of a command in it, Magina smiled. Kael had written, as he had said. He wondered what the man wanted from him that he had to go to his ranch. But through it all, even when Magina had hated him, Kael had never lied and never done anything to hurt him. Unlike Magina. He cringed. No matter what Kael wanted, he'd do it. It was the least, after everything.

'I'll be there. Can't give you a time yet because it depends on what there is to do on the ranch. But I'll come over.' He sent it and then stared at Kael's text a moment longer. He just wanted to put the phone away and try to get to sleep again, when a new message appeared.

'Why are you awake in the middle of the night?'

'The usual.' He didn't want to whine about it so he just texted this two words. For him it was usual but he really didn't want to talk or write about his nightmares.

'Are you all right? Want me to come over?'

Magina stared at the screen. He was at a loss for words. The… what? What should he answer to that? A simple yes or no would do, but he couldn't get himself to write either of it. He didn't even know which of the two he actually wanted. And what was that question? After there had been no reaction today to his apology, now the man offered to come over? And do what? Sit next to his bed the whole night? Hold his hand? Talk? Cuddle? He didn't dare think further than that. Maybe Kael was drunk? The man confused him.

'It's okay, I'm used to it.'

'Sleep well.'

Surprisingly enough, after this short encounter he did. He slept until Dragon poked his head into Magina's room, said it was rather late and asked if he was fine.

Magina blinked and when he saw that is was indeed late, bright sunlight streaming into the room, he jumped out of bed immediately. Usually he didn't need any kind of clock because he couldn't sleep very well anyway. Maybe he should get one, since this hadn't been the first time and he hated to be up late.

Thankfully Dragon had made breakfast and so he didn't have to waste time on that but could shovel down some eggs with bacon and then head out. Dragon had also already started on the morning routine and Magina fell in where there was still something to do.

"I'll have to drive over to the Sunstrider ranch later, can you stay here alone for a while?" Magina and Dragon were working side by side in the barn.

"Of course I can stay here alone. I'll go out and check the fence. Especially the section I told you about. Anything else that's on the agenda?"

"I'm not sure. I think we'll have to paint the buildings all during the next few weeks. Before the weather gets bad. Maybe you can check where we have to start, which on is the worst. And we have to put up new fences for more grazing ground for the horses. I haven't decided where, yet. Except that, there is only the usual."

That settled, Magina got ready to head over. He put on a clean shirt and washed his hands and face. He even took the revolver, just in case. He checked in the mirror. Not perfect but good enough, he guessed. He wiped over his boots once, just to remove the worst dirt and then got in the truck. One of his dogs obviously wanted to accompany him, so he let him hop in.

During the drive he wondered what Kael wanted from him that he had to go to the ranch of his family. He had said nothing about the 'why'.

He was nervous to go to the ranch and he was full of conflicting feelings. There was hate and hope and disgust and anticipation and it was all mixed together with the nervousness. He hadn't hesitated, went over because Kael had requested it and nothing in the world would've stopped him heeding a request from the man. Not after all he had done to him.

When he got out of the truck, having parked on the ranch, someone was already coming over. "Mr. Turstarkuri? Come, I'll show you to Kael."

Wow, that was a very formal greeting. He had obviously been expected. Following the man, Magina looked around. There was a lot of activity on the ranch, people milling about as well as animals. A few dogs came running over but didn't even bark. They just sniffed at Magina and his dog before following alongside them. It was all completely different than Magina's ranch. But the Sunstrider ranch was a lot bigger, with many horses and a lot of other animals in addition to the cattle. One would need many hands to keep a ranch of this size going.

Maybe it hadn't been too bad that the Sunstrider had taken some of his land and cattle after the fire. Magina wouldn't have been able to care for it all on his own. He had been exhausted every single day with the amount of work there had been to do. Any more and he'd have probably broken down sooner or later. Not that it had been right of the man to do so and if he hadn't laid the fire it wouldn't have been necessary. For a moment the hatred and disgust flared high, but Magina was here on request of Kael, he didn't have to think about the Sunstrider's involvement in his past. He could focus on the present. And on Kael.

Seeing this here, the ranch, it had probably been for the best nonetheless, that someone had taken land and cattle.

Strange, that Magina was suddenly able to look at it more rationally, at least at parts of it. He guessed living with Dragon had really been good for him. And apologizing to Kael had been, as well. Though there was still the hatred for the Sunstriders and magic, it wasn't as sharp as before. He had been on the ranch a few times but only now was he able to look at everything and see how it appeared to be well-cared for. How the people all seemed to be happy. How, though there was much activity, there was no hectic pace. It seemed the Sunstrider wasn't a bad ranch owner.

That didn't say much about the character of the man, but people who were cruel or unjust usually didn't have ranches that functioned like this.

Kael was with the horses, like the last time Magina had been here. He was in work clothes, black pants, purple shirt, and a black bandana around his neck. He had no hat on and his blond hair, bound back into a high ponytail, appeared almost white in the sun. A few strands fell into his face and he stroked them behind his ears. He talked with the horse in front of him, his voice low and steady, while the animal watched Kael suspiciously. As the man moved closer, the beast stayed where it was, ears twitching.

Magina stopped. He knew that he shouldn't approach now. It would make the horse nervous and Kael obviously wanted to achieve something there. The man he had been following stopped as well, looked at Magina, then nodded and left. He wasn't needed anymore, had brought Magina to Kael. And this time Magina watched. He loved watching the Sunstrider, could do so all day long. No matter if it was in the rodeo or like now, him actually working. He was so beautiful and the way he approached the horse in front of him was mesmerizing. Magina couldn't understand what he said but his low voice drifted over and the same way it calmed the animal, it calmed Magina. His nervousness faded and he relaxed.

Maybe Kael felt that he was being watched, because he looked over. As he saw Magina standing there, he smiled and backed away from the horse to come over.

"Hey. I didn't expect you this early."

At Magina's frown, because it wasn't early in the least anymore, he laughed. "I know, my father keeps pointing it out to me every day, but I just got up, so for me it is early."

"You are beautiful." The words were out before Magina could stop them. To see Kael laughing, it must've short-circuited something in his brain. Because he knew that one didn't blurt out things like that, especially not when one had no relationship with the other person. But damn if it wasn't true. The last time he had seen Kael, at almost the same spot, the man had looked tired and unhappy. It was an absolute contrast to now.

Kael blushed, an adorable pink tinge to his pale skin. "Thank you."

Something shifted between them, making Magina suddenly hyper aware of Kael. Desire flared, stronger than ever. The time apart hadn't dimmed it the least.

"Amazing," Kael muttered. "it's still there. After all this time." He hesitated, for a long moment just staring at Magina. Well, Magina didn't know what to do here. He had been invited over without being given a reason for it. He didn't know how to react to Kael or to anything on the Sunstrider ranch.

With a jerk, Kael turned around. "Come, follow me."


	11. Chapter 11

Everything on the ranch was neat and Magina was fascinated by it. There were a lot more buildings than on his ranch and the workload it took to keep them simply functioning was high. To keep them looking like this was amazing. Though, of course, he didn't know how much magic was involved in it. Aside from what he had seen Kael and his brothers do and the knowledge of the Sunstriders being able to create fire, he knew nothing specific about their magical abilities.

The thought of magic left a fool taste in his mouth and made him slightly itchy, but he tried to tone it down. Kael would have a reason to bring him here and he didn't want to make the man angry or anything. Not after everything Magina had done.

They entered a barn and Kael searched for something or someone.

"I knew I'd find you here."

At the words, a man inside one of the lock-ups straightened and stood up. He was dirty from head to toes but his resemblance to Kael was visible through it. How had he not seen it, when he had first met Kael? The blond hair, the pale eyes, the fine features. Just a bit older. Magina knew him, it was the Sunstrider senior. Kael's father. He had met him before.

The pain he felt at seeing him was strong, mixed with hatred and fear. His breath caught and his heart skipped a beat.

Something brushed against his hand and though the contact was fleeting, it brought him back before his mind even had the chance to sink into the pit of panic. Kael stood very close and his fingers brushed against Magina's again. The backs of their hands touched and it was definitely on purpose. Magina took a controlled breath and focused on the touch for a moment.

The man frowned and when he looked at Magina, the frown worsened. "Oh boy, just what I've been looking forward to do today." He sighed and wiped his hands on his pants. Not that it was of any use, as dirty as the pants were the hands wouldn't get cleaner by wiping them there. "All right, then let's get this over with." He exited the lock-up and walked out of the barn. Kael followed and so Magina did as well.

The words and the way the man had looked at him made him uneasy. But there was no turning back now. And Magina trusted Kael, as strange as it might be.

Inside the house, Kael sat down at the kitchen table and nodded at Magina to do the same. The man washed his hands in the kitchen sink. Then he took a place from which he could look equally good at Kael and at Magina.

"I don't know what Kael told you, but he forced me into this. He pressured and blackmailed me until I didn't have a choice."

The man waited, supposedly for an answer. "Um, sir, he told me nothing at all. I don't even know why I'm here." Magina was glad that his voice was firm and didn't quaver or anything. He didn't want to come across as insecure and frightened, no matter if he was and wished to be anywhere but here at the moment. He wasn't even sure if 'sir' was the right way to address the Sunstrider.

"Awesome." He didn't sound like he really thought this was awesome. Kael remained silent.

"Okay, then I'll tell you. I didn't put fire to your ranch all these years ago and the land and the cattle I got from you..."

Kael audibly cleared his throat.

"The land and the cattle I took from you," the Sunstrider cast an annoyed glance at Kael before focusing on Magina again, "was taken unjustified. I can't give it back, not without tremendous loss. Kael tried to get me to do it nonetheless but really, that's impossible. Nothing he could offer can balance it out. What I can do, though, is give you a share in the winnings it brings. Kael and I aren't of one mind about what percentage, so we'll have to negotiate a bit there. Does that suffice?"

Magina was speechless and could only stare. The man, the owner of the ranch and the oldest Sunstrider around, told him right out that he hadn't been responsible for the fire. Of course he could as well be lying, but the way he had said it, as if it didn't really matter to him, it made Magina think that it might be the truth.

And then he was also offering back part of Magina's belongings, part of the things he had taken from him after the fire. Not completely, but this was amazing. It was something Magina would never have expected.

He stared at Kael, who had made his father do this somehow and wondered how he had achieved it. And why. Kael smiled and nodded. He was clearly pleased with himself and what he had accomplished here.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to give you everything back, but my father is right, the loss would be immense. Not only to him, that I would've ignored." This got him a glare from the older Sunstrider, which he completely ignored. "But without the land and the cattle, many of the people working for him wouldn't be needed any more. And since you don't hire anyone, it wouldn't be fair to them. Besides, I don't think that it would be good for your health, even with the help you currently have, to get more land and cattle. But I thought that this was a fair compromise. A way for you to get something out of the land and the cattle that were taken from you. Without you having to do anything. Personally, I'd go for at least fifty percent of the winnings. Won't be easy for my father to calculate it but I can guarantee he won't cheat you."

It was the perfect compromise. It didn't make the theft from this long ago insignificant, but it made it less painful. Like a step forward, away from the past.

"Don't listen to him, fifty percent is way too high. I have to do all the work and you can just sit there and let the money come. I offer you ten percent."

That was like on the market in town. But not quite. Magina took a moment to think about it all. It was happening very fast, and he couldn't decide within a few moments. It was simply too much. "I need a few days to think about it, sir. Since Kael didn't tell me anything, I've just heard this all for the first time. I'll come over again when I have decided. Is that acceptable?" He tried to be as polite as possible.

"I give you three days."

"Dad!" Kael protested and the older Sunstrider sighed.

"Okay, take as long as you wish. But the cooperation starts when you decided, not backdated." He stood up and offered Magina his hand. "I'll see you then, Mr. Turstarkuri. Have a nice day. Oh, and sorry for everything back then. I tried to extinguish the fire faster, but whoever cast the spell was extremely strong and I wasn't as skilled as I am today." Then he left.

Magina remained seated and stared at the table top in front of him. The Sunstrider had helped to erase the fire? Magina couldn't remember that.

Also the Sunstrider offered part of what he had taken back. And he had apologized. Magina was way out of his depth. The whole situation seems surreal.

"I know this doesn't erase all that has happened to you, but I thought it was the least I could do." Kael sounded concerned. "Are you all right?"

"I'm not sure." He looked at Kael. "Do you think he said the truth, about the fire?" And here he was, asking Kael if he believed his father. But then, Magina had to trust Kael. Even in this.

"I don't know. Usually he doesn't lie. At worst, he talks around something or doesn't answer some question or such, but he seldom outright lies. Which doesn't mean he's not capable of it. And the way he took your land and cattle was crass. But I suppose he just saw an opening to get the stuff he wanted and he didn't care about your personal problems. I don't think he really laid the fire. It's a little too much, even for him. He can be ruthless, but to kill people, even on accident? I don't think he'd go that far. Not for some land."

Now that he had met the man, and not right after some life-altering event of which he had thought him responsible, but with a little distance, he didn't think it had been him, either. The magic around the Sunstrider was strong, it was in the air all around him, but it didn't truly smell like the magic of the fire had.

On one hand, it was a relief, especially with Magina being involved with Kael, somehow. But on the other hand, Magina now didn't know who had done it. And for what purpose.

"I'll go home. I need to think on it all." Magina got up and went to his truck. His dog snuck out from underneath the table and followed. Kael did so, too. He leaned against the doorframe after Magina had gotten into the driver seat.

"You need anything from me?"

Magina shook his head. Then a thought struck him. "How did you get your father to give me a share?"

"It wasn't that hard. I simply promised him I'd stay on the ranch and work with his horses. Because I'm the best and he knows he'd never find someone as good who is as cheap as I am."

It didn't even sound like bragging, more like pointing out facts. The man was truly fascinating.

"I thought he doesn't like you."

"What? Why?"

"One of the men here said something, it sounded like it. Because you are gay. Or in the lines of it."

Kael smiled. "Well, he isn't very happy about me being gay, but has come to terms with it. And it isn't that bad between us. We are not best friends, but we respect each other and we get along without problems. I even missed him when I was away and I'm sure he missed me, too. And not only because I'm good with the horses."

He was so beautiful as he leaned there, looking up at Magina with a soft smile.

He couldn't resist, though Kael had said nothing about the apology and about them. Magina's hand was shaking a tiny bit as he raised it to brush his fingertips against Kael's cheek and then into his hair. He leaned down very slowly, watching Kael as he did so. The man didn't move, simply stared back, smile never leaving his lips.

Magina's hand moved until he cupped Kael's nape. They were so close now and Kael still hadn't stepped away. So Magina shut his eyes and closed the remaining gap between them. Kael met him halfway.

The kiss was sweeter than any they had shared before. It was so soft and slow and he was sure nothing had ever felt this good.

Magina's heart beat heavy in his chest and his stomach did flip-flops. To finally feel Kael again, under his hands, against his lips, it was amazing. It was perfect.

As they parted, before the kiss deepened, before either of them could get lost in the sensations, as had happened every time before, they both smiled.

"Since..." Kael cleared his throat, the word having been a raspy sound. "Since you now have help on your farm, will you go on a date with me?"

"You'd still go on a date with me? After all I've done." Magina was incredulous. Of course he had apologized, but he had never expected that Kael would forgive him. He had hoped, yes, but he hadn't thought it would actually happen.

"You told me why you did what you did and though it doesn't make it okay, it makes it understandable. But you saw your errors, you apologized. Which couldn't have been easy at all. And I don't think you'll do something like that again. You even came to the ranch today, without questioning me and you talked with my father. I know it must hurt you to even look at him, from what you told me. So yes, I liked you before you found out I was a Sunstrider and I liked you after you took all the pain onto you to apologize to me. Yes, I'd still go on a date with you. I'll invite you to a date."

Magina kissed Kael again. Not so soft this time, but shorter. And still sweet. "I'd love to."

His grin made Kael look so beautiful, it took Magina's breath away. "What about your boyfriend?"

"Oh." Kael looked sheepish all of a sudden. "I lied. I don't have a boyfriend. I didn't know why you called and I didn't want to talk to you. I thought it was the easiest way to get rid of you. I'm sorry."

It made Magina uncomfortable, that Kael had been able to lie to him that easily. But he seemed to be genuinely sorry about it, and it had been when he still had believed Magina to be an arsehole (which he had had every right to think).

Still, or maybe because of it, he couldn't wrap his head around all that had happened today. "Why do you do this? I mean help me and all? I don't deserve it, not after the way I treated you."

"The fact that you think that makes you deserve it. But there are several reasons. Some might be a little selfish. I'm not sure I want to tell you all. I guess the most important is that I felt sorry for you, yesterday, and then I confronted my father. I was a little mad and told him he was an arsehole and that he stole from you. He yelled and then I yelled and then I put this deal out there." Kael shrugged. "I guess he's still mad at me but I am at him, too. Sometimes he is too focused on himself and on his ranch. He can't put himself in the position of others and so he tends to does stuff that feels very selfish." A grin spread over his face now. "And I really want to explore this …" he gestured from himself to Magina and back, "thing, whatever it is, that is between us."

At these words, the thing flared again. It was desire, no use in denying that. But it was more, Magina thought. Attraction and the need to be close, not only physically. Curiosity about this amazing man, the want to learn everything about him.

"So, tomorrow? I can pick you up if you want." Kael had taken a step back, maybe so they wouldn't get distracted by each other and this…. thing.

"Gladly." He hesitated for a moment. "Do I have to expect a visit from your brothers again? When we see each other?"

"Oh. No. they didn't try to beat you up because we were seen together." A grin flashed. "You'll have to tell me one day what exactly happened there. They don't want to talk about it. I guess they think it's too humiliating." He shook his head and took another step back. "They came for you because they thought you dumped me or something. They are very protective. It should be a talk on the lines of 'don't hurt our brother ever again'. So don't worry, first, they are a little afraid of you now and second, as long as you don't make me sad, or angry or something like that you are safe."

Magina was incredulous. They had wanted to tell him not to hurt Kael? They had really done a more than shitty job at getting that across. And he thought he had a problem with communication and stuff, because of him having been alone on the ranch for such a long time. But they hadn't been alone and were still not able to communicate. He guessed he was doing rather fine considering that.

Kael laughed, probably at his expression. "Yeah, I know. Are we fine, then? I'll text you about the time. Is that okay?"

He nodded and nodded again. His heart fluttered a little. He had a date. A date with the most beautiful man he had ever seen. He.

Smiling, he closed the door of his truck. He could've kissed Kael again, but it was probably good that he had brought some distance between them. Magina wanted to kiss him and kiss, and never stop kissing him. Instead he waved as he drove from the ranch.


End file.
